Nichijou: Hyperdimension Neptunia edition: Ordinary Life with the CPUs)

There! Right There!

Vert calls everyone in the basilicom including her human friends, Grey, Dave, Roxy and Vic while Neptune hasn't arrived yet. Vert has suspected that Noire is gay, and to put that to the test, she orders Dave to show his abs to Noire. Dave does what Vert has said and he casually removes his top clothes just near Noire. Noire didn't even flinch or even steal a glance and Dave puts back his clothes and regroups with everyone

Vert : There! Right There! Look at that tan, well tinted skin. Look at the killer shape she's in. Look at that slightly stubbly chin. Oh Please she's gay, totally gay. 

Grey: I'm not about to celebrate. Every trait could indicate the totally straight expatriate. This girl's not gay, I say not gay. 

Everyone: That is the elephant in the room. Well is it relevant to assume that a girl who wears perfume is automatically radically fey? 

Vert: But look at her coiffed and crispy locks. 

Nepgear  Look at her silk translucent socks. 

Grey: There's the eternal paradox. Look what we're seeing. 

Everyone: What are we seeing? 

Grey: Is she gay? 

Roxy: Of course she's gay. 

Grey: Or European? 

Everyone: ohhhhhh...

With Noire being puzzled on what is going on right now as everyone thinks whether Noire is either gay or European.

Everyone: Gay or European? It's hard to guarantee. Is she gay or European? 

Roxy: Well, hey don't look at me. 

Dave: You see they bring their girls up different in those charming foreign ports. They play peculiar sports. 

Everyone: In shiny shirts and tiny shorts.Gay or foreign fella? The answer could take weeks. They both say things like "ciao bella"while they kiss you on both cheeks. 

Roxy: Oh please. 

Everyone: Gay or European?So many shades of gray. 

Grey: Depending on the time of day, the French go either way. 

Everyone: Is he gay or European?or -

Blanc: There! Right There! Look at that condescending smirk. Seen it on every girl at work. That is a metro hetero jerk. That girl's not gay, I say no way. 

Everyone: That is the elephant in the room. Well is it relevant to presume that a hottie in that costume 

Dave: Is automatically-radically 

Grey: Ironically chronically
Vert: Certainly pertin'tly
Roxy: Genetically medically
Everyone: GAY!OFFICIALLY GAY!OFFICIALLY GAY GAY GAY GAY -

And suddenly, Noire hugs Vic that made everyone stop claiming that she's gay. 

Everyone: Damnit! 
(Author: DAMNIT!!!!!)

Everyone: Gay or European? 

Roxy: So stylish and relaxed. 

Everyone: Is she gay or European? 

Grey: I think her legs are waxed. 

Dave: But they bring their girls up different there. 

Everyone: It's culturally diverse. It's not a fashion curse. If she wears a kilt or bears a purse.
Everyone: Gay or just exotic?I still can't crack the code. 

Grey: Yes her accent is hypnotic but her shoes are pointy-toed. 

Roxy and Grey: Huh. 

Everyone: Gay or European?So many shades of gray. 

Vic: But if she turns out straight I'm free at eight on Saturday. 

Everyone: Is she gay or European?gay or European? Gay or Euro- 

Roxy: Wait a minute! Give me a chance to crack this guy. I have an idea I'd like to try 

Grey: The floor is yours. 

Roxy: So Ms. Black Heart...This alleged affair with Mr. Godinez has been going on for...? 

Noire: 2 years. 

Roxy: And your first name again is...? 

Noire: Noire. 

Roxy: And your girlfriend's name is...? 

Noire: Neptune. 

Everyone widens their eyes as they hear Noire's answer. Most of them are cheering in joy while Roxy and Grey high-fives at each other and for Vic facepalms in disappointment.

Noire: I'm sorry! I misunderstand. You say girlfriend. I thought you say best friend. Neptune is my best friend. 

And out of the blue, Neptune suddenly appears inside the basilicom.

Neptune: You bastard!You lying bastard! That's it. I no cover for you, no more! 

As Neptune approaches the group, she takes off her hoodie as she raises it in the air.

Neptune: Peoples! I have a big announcement! This girl is Gay and European! 

Everyone: WOAH!!!

Neptune: And neither is disgrace you've got to stop your being a completely closet case. It's me not him she's seeing, no matter what she say. I swear she'd never ever ever swing the other way. You are so gay! You big parfait! You flaming boy band cabaret!

Noire: I'm straight! 

Neptune: You were not yesterday *kisses Noire on the lips*

Neptune: So if I may, I'm proud to say, She's gay! 

Everyone: And European! 

Neptune: Shee's gay!

Everyone: And European! 

Neptune: She's gay! 

Everyone: And European and Gay! 

Noire: Fine okay I'm gay! 

Everyone: Hooray!

And with that, Noire accepts her gay side as she kisses Nep on the cheeks as everyone celebrates in joy.

With Shoubon being late claiming that his dogoo was missing.

Author's note

A big thanks to Lycania24 for this collab chapter!