Acrimony 🖤

Chapter 1: The start of it all

  ~ Friday. August 23,2019~

It fast forwards to this day. The day I was given a court day for a restraining order against a man I once loved and gave my all to. The judge said to me " you are giving this restraining order to stay away from the defendant or you'll be sentences to 25 years in prison do I make myself clear ?". I tuned out the court room and everything he had said because I couldn't believe the man I love would do this to me I was completely zoned out , hurt , confused and deep down inside of me wants to harm him. The judge raised his voice louder to get my attention getting a nudge on my shoulder from my attorney I speak  out to him " yes your honor". Fast forward the next day I was given a therapy session explaining to her I did nothing wrong to him at all in no kind of way and in the back of my mind I still ask the same question from then to now "why ?". I pull out a cigarette and start to light it up one puff calmed me just a little bit also; still stuck on the fact of the situation that nobody can understand because it's all so fucked up! and nobody see's everything I've done for him ,But point fingers at me when I act out for the events that happened but he gets away with it while I suffer in it. I yell out " all this is bull shit everything is just bullshit ". The therapist leaned and said to me "how about you dig deep on what's bothering you " . I rubbed up and down on my arm trying to figure out where to begin so I asked her " how far back you want to go ?" She said to me " the beginning". I took a deep breath and i just closed my eyes the begin to relive everything .