Kepler One - The Choosing

Chapter 9

I never fancied myself much as a teacher. I always thought of myself too stupid or inexperienced to do the job. So before bed, and with Otto's permission, I told Tristan of the secret group hoping that he would help.

"Sorry. Ain't interested," he answered.

His response shocked me, and for a long time, my mouth stayed open, unable to close itself. I stared dumbly at the floor as he finished dressing for bed and slipped under his sheets.

"Why won't you help us?" I finally asked.

"Why should I?" he replied. "Listen, I don't mean to sound harsh or anything, but what's the point? Really? Everyone keeps telling you that this is a race, a competition. Why would I wanna help my competitors? I mean, it kinda sounds crazy to me."

"But you're helping me?"

"Yeah, but you're different," he said, fixing his pillow and closing his eyes.

"How? How am I different?"

Tristan opened his eyes again and stared at the ceiling, letting out a long, exhausted sigh.

"You're different 'cos I think you can actually make it. Those guys are a lost cause and can offer me nothing in return. Don't get me wrong. I really wish they could make it, but I know they can't. If you get involved with them, you'll only get your heartbroken when they fail. And they'll do nothing but drag you down with them, too," he said, turning his back to me to end the conversation. "You gotta make smart choices here, Zoe. And figuring out who's most beneficial to befriend is more important than you realise."

My brain couldn't comprehend the words he was saying. I had pictured Tristan as this hero, the strong silent type who helped people without the need to brag about it, but the words coming out of his mouth smashed that image like a rock through a glass window. He wasn't the strong silent type at all; he was just the silent self-serving type. I wondered how he saw my friendship benefiting him. What was he after? My anger surged, and I nearly ripped my night clothes as I pulled them on.

"What's the matter?" Nathan called from across the room. "Lovers have a tiff?"

"Get lost," I replied hotly.

Nathan's was the last voice I wanted to hear right now. I lay in my bed, pulled the covers up to my nose, and mulled over the disappointment fuelling my anger. The lights went out like clockwork at eight p.m., like they did every night. This was Bunker Twelve's method to conserve energy. Anyone left milling around after curfew had to do it in the dark. All my energy, however, was spent trying to figure out what Tristan meant.

He's right, I thought. Otto might not make it through the selection process, and if I spend my nights helping him, I'll only lose out on sleep and time I could use to better myself. I needed to learn how to read, however, and Otto was the only one offering. Could I be selfish and use Otto to get what I needed, only to leave without returning the favour? I already knew the answer. I knew what it was like to be left behind, forgotten, with no one to help, and I wasn't going to do that to anyone.

It took a long time to fall asleep but no sooner had I closed my eyes, then I was being woken again by a sweaty hand shaking my shoulder. I sat bolt-upright and balled my fist, waiting for my eyes to adjust to the darkness and find the face I needed to clobber.

"Zoe, it's m-m-m-me," Otto whispered.

"Oh, sorry."

Otto gave a nervous smile and gestured for me to follow him. The cement floor was cold on my feet as he led me out to the corridor. It was eerily quiet, deserted even by the drones. Never having lived in a tier where drones hung around, I had no idea that three in the morning was recharging time, but we weren't left completely unsupervised. Whispers travelled from the end of our corridor through the still air and reached my ears.