start somewhere; markhyuck ✓

thirteen

thursday, july 18th, 3:33 pm. the park.

"ok so basically, i'm an idiot, that's all," donghyuck claps his hands together.

"hyuck, you're not an idiot, look, i understand that you didn't want to tell us about mark. i understand that you were scared," renjun places a hand on donghyuck's shoulder, "but you shouldn't have just abandoned us. we were all worried sick for you. chenle almost cried."

"i just feel like i've messed things up again," donghyuck sighs, "i always thought it would be safer to not tell anyone i was you know..."

"i get it."

"he said he loved me,"

donghyuck's deep dark secret is out. the secret he's been hiding for his whole life. donghyuck's head lays low on the picnic table. renjun taps donghyuck's head.

"can you please hang out with us tonight?" renjun asks, "everyone wants to see you so bad."

"ok."

_________

"hyuck!" the group exclaims. the four boys run up to renjun and donghyuck. they talk about all their summers and how much he's missed.

"hey everyone," donghyuck chuckles getting overwhelmed by the sudden affection, "i missed you guys."

renjun had texted the others to not bring up donghyuck's secret coming out and be respectful. donghyuck is silently grateful.

"let's go out tonight," chenle offers, "a night by the river would be pretty right?"

the six of them set out and for the first time this summer donghyuck doesn't feel so hated. of course when he passes groups of teenage boys he gets a weird look but his friends keep him safe.

donghyuck sits on the cool grass watching jisung and chenle run around. jeno and jaemin look out onto the river. jaemin leans against the railing, jeno wraps his arm around him, they kiss. donghyuck feels so happy yet so bitter.

that should be him. happy. happy with someone he loves. donghyuck has had no contact with mark in the past three weeks but he thinks it's for the best. this is how their relationship ends isn't it? a modern day tragedy. a suburban love story.

"how's mark doing?" donghyuck asks. maybe renjun has seen him on social media.

"the whole football team hates him now, when they're warming up mark's always all alone," renjun lies down, "it's the worst sport to be gay in."

donghyuck's stomach hurts, it's all his fault.

"mark's worried though. i ran into him the other day and he asked how you were. you're kind of all he has left at this point," renjun explains.

"what did you say?"

"i said you needed space, that you weren't ready to talk to him. he understands, mark just wants you to know he still cares for you."

donghyuck wants to reach out to mark so bad. talk about their feelings, talk about them. he wants mark so bad.

"i'll talk to him soon."

"ok, but please be careful," renjun warns.

"let's party, bitches!" chenle yells, everyone yells back. summer finally begins.