//. love, love, love. a.i

pressure

A/N: so hi lol this is my new story lol & this is my first time writing anything so sorry if it sucks im new at this and i rly hope u guys like it !!! feel free to comment & pm me ideas and stuff ok bye enjoy!!!!) I don't really think about it anymore. I can't. Because every time I do, I go even more insane than I already am. Nobody knows, either. Well, maybe my sister does. Her name's Julie. She's absolutely perfect. She's pretty, skinny, smart, just stunning, really.    She's got perfect grades, getting her masters degree, and here I am, nineteen, with a three year old.

Before you even say anything,   Before you think I'm just some slut who got knocked up, that just isn't what happened and it's not the full story.

I continue writing in my small leather journal, when I hear tiny footsteps padding on the floor, and the door flings wide open.

I turn around quickly,  closing my journal and putting it in my bedside drawer.

"Hi, baby, what's wrong?" I asked,  looking at the small girl in front of me.

I could not thank god enough that she looked like me only and nothing like her father.

Well, except for her nose.

Her dark hair was pulled back into her tiny ponytail.  Her hair was otherwise sleek and a little below her shoulders.  Her light hazel eyes mirrored mine as she looked exhausted and rubbed her eyes. 

She had her small stuffed tiger clutched into her grasp, and she climbed on the bed with me, seeking my assistance.

I lifted her up and kissed her cheek.

"Mommy, I'm hungry," she said softly.

"Amelia, didn't I tell you to eat earlier and you said you weren't hungry?" I asked.

She shook her head and I heard a small growl come from her stomach.

I pinched her cheeks teasingly and got up,  letting her legs hang on my sides as she walked with me with me to the kitchen, me carrying her.

"Hmm, what do you want?  We have...chicken nuggets, ravioli, sandwiches, and macaroni," I said.

She had her finger in her mouth, and too it out just long enough to say, "macaroni."

"Okay. I got to put you down so you can make it, okay?"

She nodded and let go of me and went to watch tv in the small living room on my phone. 

I made sure that she didn't tell anyone my password,  so that if there were ever an emergency or something she could use it herself.

I heard sounds of Barbie and such coming from just a few feet away, shaking my head and sighing.

I put all the ingredients into the pot and began stirring it before it was finally ready.

I let it cool, and grabbed her sippy cup, filling it with milk.

"Mia, it's ready!" I called.

She came back into the way too small kitchen, and crawled onto the chair. 

I set her food down in front of her, and her milk beside her.

"What do you say?" I asked her after seeing her scarf down her macaroni.

"Thank you," she said, flashing me a view of her tiny teeth.

She took a few sips of her milk, and then crawled into my lap, giving me a warm hug, then jumping off and running to the bathroom.

I followed her, and stood beside the doorframe, watching her brush her small teeth.

After, I lifted her up and carried her back to bed, and luckily, she fell asleep quickly.

I sighed, going back into my room, and taking out my phone.

iMessage from: Blocked Number:

I want to see her.  And I want to see you.  Fucking let me or so help me I'll go to court.

I shook my head, and began typing as tears began streaming down my face.

iMessage:

You're fucking terrible. If anyone believed me you'd be in jail for what you did.

iMessage from: Blocked number

you loved it,  and that's why I'm not in jail. And she's my fucking daughter too, damn it. let me see her

iMessage:

Fuck off.  you ruined my life. If I didn't love Amelia so much you wouldn't be alive right now.

iMessage from: Blocked number

And just what do you mean by that, princess?  I'm here, not in jail. Just let me fucking be with you guys. You need the money, ik you do.

iMessage:

I'm perfectly fine.  She goes to school, I work, we live in a decent place, and we have money to eat food. I don't need you and I never will so stop texting me

iMessage from: Blocked number

keep running your damn mouth, and you'll get your teeth knocked out.  accept my offer or you'll be sorry

iMessage: 

you're talking to me like that, and you want to see us? lol,  you're fucking delusional.

iMessage from: Blocked number

let me see her. 

iMessage: 

you know what? I told you no.  The only way you're gonna see her is if I am there with you and her. She's not gonna be around your friends without my permission, not around any of your flings, nothing.  So set up a damn date,  tell me, and leave me the fuck alone

iMessage from: Blocked number

I'll see you both tomorrow at 6

I rubbed my temples,  and wiped my tears away, before falling asleep.