My story

After

After all this I lived my life normally but still trying to forget him I just continued with my normal boring life talking with my friends , going to school etc . The next year and the year it followed I stalked him like every other day I wanted to know if he's still with her so I can tell myself at least it was worth it ,worth it to leave him so he can be happy with her . During those years I did everything I could to overcome my social anxiety . It was a very very hard journey I pushed myself everyday to do something new even though I was petrified just by doing anything. And after all those efforts I became what I am today . I changed completely I had new friends I talked with other boys but none of them were like him . Until one day I met a guy , Marvin we were completely opposite but I didn't care I gave love another try even though I shouldn't have. I don't know if he was just a challenge to prove to myself that I'm capable to handle someone like him. He almost never was sober never was completely there never gave me enough time I just always felt not enough for him even though I did everything I could to please him . This guy broke my heart and I forgave him so many times because I thought that this was love or that I'm the problem . I'm just really grateful that I'm in a good place right now because I felt like I'm miserable everyday in my life with him . He was attractive but from the inside he was still so immature and I never wanted to accept it. I rejected all the boys before just to be with someone like him and I don't regret what I did after Damien all the guys weren't enough for me so i didn't want to give them even a chance.