Stories For A Rainy Day

Fuck The Memories

This was a request on my AO3 account. The OCs in this mini doc belong to @tegan_is_done on Archive Of Our Own. That said and done, I hope you enjoy. I always take request. Stay lovely. Kouver.

A loud explosion causes me to jolt awake and immediately fall to the floor in a crouching position. As I take in my surroundings I realize most of my fellow men are gone. I see severed limbs across the floor coated in ashes that are currently falling all around. I take notice of the fire devouring my surroundings.

"Oh dear fuck!" I hear one of the men, Blaine, scream out. I can hear the agony in his voice which causes me to scan the building for him. It's difficult to decipher where anything is anymore, but we could be the only survivors.

"Blaine! Where are you?" I yell into the chaos. I run my hair through my hair and get my mind ready for this hell. I deliberately walk towards where his bunk would have been before the explosion.

"Tegan honey, please" I hear a male voice all but sob out to me. Though, it doesn't belong to any of my men. "Nothing can hurt you here, I promise" the voice finishes in a yelp. Wait, was that Blue? If that's my Blue then this hell is a nightmare, I have to get out of here.

I hear a forced groan that draws my attention away from Blue, "Tegan is that you? By my bunk under a mother fucking wall. Just get out of this man i'm done." He moans out in pain. A short snort leaves my throat, he thinks i'd leave him to burn?

I come up to his bunk and move rubble out of my way in the process. "Shut the fuck up, I ain't leaving you here." I gruff out in response, "I'm gonna move this wall, get ready to move." I bend to the ground and brace the wall on my right shoulder. I slowly push up and bring the wall off of him. Just as he crawls out a tower comes slamming down on what's left of the roof.

The crash sends a piece of metal flying to the wall that's currently supported by my shoulder. A searing pain rips through my chest as a roar escapes my lips.

Blue POV
I feel something thrashing beside me in the bed. I pause for a second before realizing Tegan is having another nightmare. The thought causes me to bolt from my sleeping position and turn to face him. I see him writhing beside me while grabbing his shoulder. He has sweat coating his entire form and he's groaning in pain. "Honey? Baby it's a dream you have to wake up." I state in the most authoritative voice I can manage.

I'm never one hundred percent what to do in these situations. The articles I've read say to not touch them, but he always responds to my touch. He tells me not to come near him, swearing he could lash out at me and hurt me. I honestly couldn't care less if he accidentally smacks me in this state though. All I want is to get him through this, to heal every single wound. I wish I could help him get past the memories that haunt him. Fuck those memories. If there is one thing I wish I could eliminate violently, it would be the pain attached to those memories. He's lost so many people.

He begins to yell out in pain which causes my heart to shatter a bit. "Tegan honey please, i need you to hear me. It's a nightmare, you're not there anymore. You are in this bed with me, nothing can hurt you here I promise." I yelp out to his writhing form.
Fuck it. I've had enough. With that thought I slowly move closer to him before placing both of my hands to his chest. I refuse to watch him in so much pain, I have to help him.

Tegan's POV
I'm suddenly waking up, again, though this time I can't breathe. It feels as if my lungs are refusing to work, while my eyes also refuse to open all the way. Where's Blaine? Did he make it out? Suddenly I feel two nimble hands on my chest, it feels as if they're anchoring me to earth. Who on earth? "Tegan, you need to breathe for me okay? It's me, Blue, can you describe me?" I hear a voice calmly plead in the darkness.

Oh god Blue? Fuck me, the explosion was four years ago. "Blue? Baby, i'm fine you should go back to sleep" I state as confidently I can manage without looking at him. My chest is still on fire and my fingertips feel as if they're going to fall off. He should be sleeping, I know he has work early in the morning. Fuck this injury, my right arm is killing me and it isnt even there.

The hands travel up to my chest to which I nuzzle them with my nose. "Bear I know you don't wish to bother me but please. Just to make me happy? Just describe me please." He pleads again in a quiet tone. He sounds absolutely wrecked.

I take a deep breath and grab one of his hands with my flesh one. "Okay wonder boy, you have bright electric blue hair that clashes perfectly with your violet eyes," my voice shakes as it escapes my chest. Though, the pain I'm feeling slowly subsides picturing the brilliant man. "You have both of your arms covered in ink. You have this amazingly naive personality." My voice settles a bit as I chuckle "you see the best in everyone while wanting to help them. You bring the sunshine to my darkest days and support me through everything. You bring out the best in me and cause me to be my best for you." I open my eyes and bring them to the eccentric man that's perched beside me. I move all my limbs around a bit realizing the panic attack has fully left me now. I send Blue a genuine grin, "Oh, and I'm absolutely in love with you." I tiredly say to him before bringing my hand to his cheek. "Thank you Baby Blue"

His calm grin turns into a cheek cracking smile "I love you too Tegan" he responds before smacking my chest. "If you don't stop trying to deal with things yourself i'm gonna have to show you what's-what. I may not be the best help when you're having a panic attack or a flashback or just having a hard day with your mind but I'll always have your back T. It doesn't make you weak. Me and you? Baby we are strongest together. I love you damn it. I'm your partner and when i say i love you? I mean all of you" he scolds me before placing his hand on my right shoulder which is missing its limb. The look on his face is genuine and full of love. He looks like an unstoppable force "You're a legend baby. Fuck the memories, I'll be here to scare every single one of them off." he finishes with tears in his eyes.

I pull him down to me and softly caress him cheek "fuck the memories baby" I whisper onto his lips before giving him a pasionate kiss. "I love you Blue, thank you." I say before nudging his nose with my own.

He gives me a boyish grin in return before shoving his face into the crook of my neck. He places a soft kiss to my neck and wraps his arms around my torso. I respond by kissing the top of his head and wrapping my arm around his form. I don't know how I got so lucky in my life, but I am forever grateful.

"First, you'd discover that the monster was not real. You'd realize that it was just an illusion that you never had anything to fear in the first place. You'd see that the monster had no teeth. This would be an incredible triumph."
― David D. Burns