I like you // Ryllon texting au

fourteen

"You cannot do that to us ever again," Spencer says after the door closes, his tone and expression serious.

"Do what?"

"Suddenly jump up, leave, say something to worry us, then not answer your phone and worry us more?" Jon says. Dallon tries to speak.

"You could've at least sent a quick text instead of disappearing and reappearing in your room, with Ryan, and-"

"Ryan tried to kill himself," Dallon blurts out, and suddenly it's dead silent. It hurts him to say it and it hurts the others to hear it. Tears start to form in his eyes because this is the first time he is taking it in. Ryan tried to kill himself. He could've done it, too, and Dallon wouldn't have known. He probably would've found out online somehow, or maybe he would track down Ryan's apartment and face and ask Shane what the hell happened to his boyfriend, only to receive the news that Ryan had killed himself.

He could've lost him.

"Oh," Spencer breathes out. Dallon swallows hard and tries not to let anxiety get the best of him.

"He's fine," Dallon chokes out, voice breaking. Their hearts sink and Dallon clears his throat. "He's... he's alright now."

"Hey, buddy, it's gonna be okay-"

Dallon steps back from Brendon's hand and he quickly blinks back his tears. He looks up, but still avoids eye contact.

"I'm bringing him with us. On tour. I can't—" He takes a deep, mildly shaky breath before his voice can break again. "I can't leave him. What if—... What if we leave, and he tries to-...? A—... And then I—"

"Dallon—"

"I can't lose him!" Dallon yells desperately, then immediately tenses at how loud the words came out. Ryan and Sarah hear it and turn towards the door. Ryan stares in shock, trying to come up with some possibility that it isn't him, but there's nothing. There's no one else it could be.

Dallon pushes his back against the wall and slides down until he is sitting. He buries his head in his hands as Jon kneels next to him.

"I'm going insane," Dallon whispers.

"You're not going insane."

"He is in there. Alive. Okay?"

Dallon looks at him with sad, glossy eyes, and nods.

"Okay. Yeah, okay." There's a pause. "I'm sorry. I... I didn't really think to check my phone, I was just focused on him, and-... well, I got into a fight."

"A fight?!" they say in unison.

"Not a physical one," Dallon says to ease their nerves.

"Well, that's good. Luke would kill us if you were to get into a fist fight."

"Where is he, anyway?"

"He texted us saying he will be here soon, just had to make sure everything on the tour bus was ready."

"I have to be going insane," Dallon claims. "Yelling at fans and defending Ryan without a second thought." He wipes his face as if it'll help him clear his thoughts, but it doesn't work. He stares at the wall. "Only love makes you that stupid. That's how the saying goes, right?"

"You love him?" Brendon asks softly.

"I... Yeah, I do." Dallon nods, not staring at anything in particular. "And that's why I can't lose him! He means everything to me, I-I can't give him up, alright?! He-... he just—"

He covers his mouth with a fist and tries to calm down. He closes his eyes and thinks. The door opens and the three look. Ryan looks at them. Jon nods towards Dallon while standing up, and Ryan kneels down and sits next to him. Anxiety rushes through him as he grabs Dallon's hand. Dallon opens his eyes.

Ryan rests his head on Dallon's shoulder and quietly says, "We can be sad together."

Dallon wraps his arms around him and holds him close. Ryan relaxes into him, the rest of his energy leaving his body with the snap of his fingers. It's calm, and they say when you're having fun, time passes. That's a lie. When you're with someone you love, whether that be romantically or platonically, you lose all sense of time. The world passes and you don't care because you're with someone who makes it worth living, makes the pain go away faster, makes you want to do nothing but to be with them.

Dallon blinks and it's as if, suddenly, Brendon and Spencer are gone, and Jon is now talking to Luke down the hall.

"I'm starting to think that if Ryan doesn't come with, Dallon won't wanna do the second wing."

Ryan's body goes limp and Dallon pulls away slightly, but Ryan follows him. He looks down and notices Ryan's eyes being closed, and Dallon looks at him like he is the best thing to ever exist. He should tell him. He should tell him his secret, how he is dweek, how he is in love with him, how he would kill millions just to make Ryan happy.

"Okay, let's go," Luke says. Dallon looks up at his manager. "Him too."