Castles ~ (Royce)

Chapter Fourteen// Same Love

"I don't have any secrets I need kept anymore. There's probably some small shit still, but you know what I mean. I was never alone, as much as I felt like it. As much as I still do sometimes. I never was. I don't think I ever could be. Thanks."
~Frank Ocean

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A1Ni*gaChres😈: Yu haven't been @ skl, iz everything Iytee?

Jayy🔥💦: I don't think I can trust you anymore Chres, if I open up 2 yu, you'll just knock me back to square one...

A1Ni*gaChres😈: I'm sorry Jake, you just make me-

Nah not that .

A1Ni*gaChres😈: I just need you to understand th-

Not that either.

A1Ni*gaChres😈: Babe, I have to figure out how I f-

I sound so gay.

Chresanto was still in his room writing a message and then deleting it since it didn't sound for enough. He didn't want to chase his love away but he needed to get his point across. He was between a rock and a hard place. He new he has to accept his feelings for Jacob, but how would it effect his family and friends ?

After this short ordeal, Chresanto decided he needed a shower since he hadn't had one. If you couldn't see it on his face, you could surely smell depression on him.

While taking a cold shower Roc burst into tears.

"WHY ME GOD! WHY DO YOU MAKE LIFE HARD, I LOVE HIM BUT ITS WRONG BUT THEN IT FEELS SO RIGHT! It's like you have fun watching he freak out."

He got out the shower to look at himself in the mirror. To him he looked so, so gay.
His hair was too curly, his eyes were too squinted and his hands were so feminine. But there was only one way to find some form of closure.

"I've got to come out, today."

***

So there they were: Andre, Ej and Chresanto's siblings sat in the sitting room awaiting there loved ones news.

"Well, you guys are probably wondering what's going on...' Mumbled Chres, scratching the back of his neck.

When I was in the third grade I thought that I was gay,
'Cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight.
I told my mom, tears rushing down my face
She's like "Ben you've loved girls since before pre-k, trippin'."
Yeah, I guess she had a point, didn't she?
Bunch of stereotypes all in my head.
I remember doing the math like, "Yeah, I'm good at little league."
A preconceived idea of what it all meant
For those that liked the same sex
Had the characteristics
The right wing conservatives think it's a decision
And you can be cured with some treatment and religion
Man-made rewiring of a predisposition
Playing God, aw nah here we go
America the brave still fears what we don't know
And "God loves all his children" is somehow forgotten
But we paraphrase a book written thirty-five-hundred years ago
I don't know