Alexandria Woods is the woman who has it all. Starring in every film and TV series possible, she's taking the industry by storm.
However, not everything is as perfect as it seems. Alexandria lives in constant fear of somebody finding out about her...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I'm hollow. I am hollow. There is no longer anything inside of me, just oxygen going in and carbon dioxide coming out. There's nothing left inside of me. Black, dark and ugly, my body feels like a case for the depressing and somber thoughts that go through my mind twenty times a day. I can't get her out of my head. I cannot get her out of my head.
Everywhere I turn, she's there. In every single piece of furniture. In every piece of clothing. Cafe's, restaurants, set, it's all her and it screams at me every time I go anywhere near. Yelling at me to come closer, but my heart bellows to get further away and that blocks out the noise of temptation. But every so often, I'll crack. I'll allow myself to sit on the sofa and look through her social media. Maybe sleep on her side of the bed. Sometimes, my soul needs a rest.
Right now, it's in a desperate need of one. Sighing as I scroll through her Instagram, I could probably recite the captions of each post by now. A photo of her and some of the cast makes my chest hurt. Noah and I smiling in the back of it. I remember that day, specifically feeling so incredibly lucky to call her my own. We both had a sense of self-assurance that we could have our relationship in private and everything would work out.
I want to laugh at those feelings now with my pessimistic attitude. But the sadness that crushes onto my chest stops me. Restricts me. Right now, there's lingering anger from her words that were spoken but at the same time, I miss her. I crave for the feelings again. I yearn for her presence.
However, one week since our world collapsed and instead of airing out our feelings, Alex and I have been radio silent to each other. There's been no communication from either side and to be honest, I'm kind of relieved. With my feelings conflicted, I know it would be wrong to get back with Alex right now so I'm left here - hollow with a bundle of strings of emotions curling tighter and more intricately by the hour, squeezing my heart tighter and tighter.
My laptop buzzes in front of me with an incoming face time from one of the producer's of this film I'm helping direct. Set in New York itself, the plot was so well written I would've been an idiot to pass up the opportunity, so I didn't. Fully immersed in the project now, I put away my phone and answer the call. It connects instantaneously and soon, I'm face to face with Kirk, the main producer.
"Hey, how are you?" I ask.
He nods, a smile stretching across his face. "Great, actually. The design people just got back to me, they're ahead of schedule with the graphics so we should be able to shoot that scene sooner than expected." Kirk pauses, tilting his head with a frown on his face. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, just loads of filming. Queries is kicking my ass." I sigh, lying yet again. "But anyway, that's great about the filming. I'll e-mail the cast who are in that scene and we can go from there. Are you still sure you want to shoot it all in New York?"
That's another plus of the project, it's all being filmed in New York. So I can continue to do Queries and direct this film with no extra travelling, which saves a lot of time. So, giving Kirk the choice to back out may of been stupid but when I see him smile in return, I breathe a sigh of relief.
