I miss your soft lips
I miss your white sheets
I miss the scratch of your unshaved face on my cheek
I was fresh from the shower, had only been back at the hotel for a half an hour when I fell into bed. I was exhausted. Always exhausted anymore. I was about to close my eyes when my phone went off.
*New Text*
Big guy: Facetime?
Of course. He would want to facetime after one of the most tiring gigs I've had in a while. I sighed to myself and hit the button. Jose picked up almost immediately.
"Hey Twinkle Toes." He said, his pillowy lips pulling into a wide smile, and doe eyes soft.
I just smiled back. I took in his surroundings. He hadn't shaved in a few days. I saw the bedding. Surely those weren't the same sheets I bought him? Nah.
"Hey, big guy. What's up?"
Jose's face got serious. "I need to tell you something before the tour starts."
I nod in response.
"It's not going to be easy, but-." Jose stopped talking and held up his left hand that wore a simple band on his ring finger.
My stomach lurched.
"Brady proposed."
My mouth went dry.
"C-congrats. I'm really happy for you."
Silence. I tried not to let the hurt show in my eyes, but I know he saw it. He always sees it.
"He's coming on tour with me."
Of course he is.
I nod again, "Congrats." I said again, "I really need to go to bed. Goodnight."
I hung up. Now I have to prepare for a tour with Jose, that's literally called the Branjie tour. God, you'd think they'd give it up already. Two years is enough. I also have to prepare to see his fiancé every day. Fabulous.
And this is so hard cause I didn't see
That you were the love of my life and it kills me
It took me months to appreciate Jose. I didn't do it when we were together, that was part of the reason we didn't work out. I've loved him with all my being since then, and I worked twice as hard to hide it. It was important now more than ever that I continue to hide it. Jose...Vanessa...Vanjie... was my friend. Jose was getting married, and his future husband was joining us on a 3-week tour in Europe. Luckily, I'll have Steve.
Looking back at what Jose and I had, it was special. Like I said, I didn't appreciate it like I should have.
Why didn't I just tell him? Because he was happy with Brady. I've met Brady a few times. He's....decent, and Jose is content.
I see your face in strangers on the street
"So, we have to be at the airport at 7pm." Steve said.
