Chapter 10

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as we were looking at each other, he put his hand on my cheek and put some of my loose hair that was flowing around my face, behind my ear, and placed his hand on my cheek once again

and before I knew it, we were coming closer and closer together as if our faces were 2 inches apart.

oh my goodness, what am I getting myself into?

what have I gotten myself into? and why am I feeling this way?

before we make any other movement I pull away, and I hear him scoff right after I did.

" I don't know you, alright, so don't expect the fact that I've only known you for a few hours, that you can try and kiss me." I say.

"what? you'd much rather be kissed with what's his face?" he says to me.

"Tobias" I say in a flattened tone.

" you're right, I think you should probably head back to your dorm." he says to me and I can tell he's either pissed, upset, humiliated or even all three.

I pack up my books, and as I'm opening the door to leave, he's disappeared into another room, and I dismiss myself.

I decided instead of heading back to my dorm so early, I should visit Tobias. I still have no idea what his problem was from earlier today. I'm not certain if he's reflecting his anger and problems toward me or if he's just going through something. if he his, then I don't see why he wouldn't come to me.

As I'm getting ready to knock on Tobias's door, I hear yelling from inside the room, and I'm struck dumb.what could possibly going on in there? I knock on the door and wait for an answer. within seconds, Anna opens the door, and her eyes are blood shot, and she looks really upset.

"I'm done talking about this Tobias! don't even think of bringing up this conversation with me again!" she practically yells but her voice breaks. she walks out of the room and speeds walk away. after she walked off, I notice, Jace, Evans step-brother, storm out of the room. and now I'm really struck dumb.

When I walk in, I see things thrown across the room, and everything is just a mess in here. I see him sitting on his couch with his face in his palms. I walk across the room, and take a seat next to him and we just sit there in silence for a few minutes.

"are you okay." I ask while trying to find a face expression in him.

"Not really, no" he responds back to me.

" Well you can talk to me-"

"No I really can't talk to you about anything" he breaks off my sentence.

"Yes you can, Tobias" I say and stand up from my seat, tired of playing this game.

"I think you should leave Beatrice." he responds to me and I'm just standing there in front of him and I'm honestly just surprised at him.

"if I leave--- I'm not coming back." I say and immediately he looks up to me in disbelief. I'm trying really hard to fight back my tears even though I can feel a heavy lump on my throat, and my eyes already starting to water.

"What ?" he says puzzled.

" You heard me, Tobias. if you ask me to leave again, I will. but, I won't come running back to you even though I have no idea what I'd be running back to anyway. I'll move on, and I can, and I will. I won't wait for you to come out of this phase. either you'll tell me what's wrong, and we can talk and go through it together, or you go through it alone, and I move on, no longer seeing a future with you." I say finally catching a breath and noticing a few tears stroll down my cheek.

he just sits there for a minute or two thinking I'm guessing. but if he really loved me- or something close to that- he wouldn't even need a second to think about it.

"I think--" his voice breaking and not being able to finish his sentence, but I already know his answer.

I storm out of his room and I shut the door behind me so loud, that it echoed down the whole hall way. I'm walking unsteady. my eyes are blurry from all the tears. I'm a mess, and I can't fix or contain myself. I'm almost to my dorm, when I just break down. I slide against the wall and break down crying, and i have no idea why I'm even crying.

Before I know it, I feel arms straddling me. Eve, is on the floor trying to calm me down. but I can't calm down. as I look up, Peter standing there and he bends down and tries to comfort me. I mean even Peter out of all people, is trying to help, and I appreciated that so much.

" Come on, let's get you inside." Eve says, and Peter carries me inside, and lays me down on my bed. I feel strange.

"is it strange that I dreamt all you guys before I met you?" I say and break into a hysterical laugh that brings tears to my eyes, and I'm soon joined by the laughters of my friends. We laughed our asses off for a good 5 minutes.

"Yes that's very strange" Peter tries to tell me but continued laughing.

I continued laughing until I felt my eyes getting more tired some and tired some until my eyes swept shut and I fell into a dark abyss.

When I open my eyes, I find Christina next to me asleep.

"Chris?--"

" Oh, morning" she says rubbing her eyes.

"did I fall asleep?"

" Yeah, you did. when I walked into the dorm last night it was about 9:25 pm, and Eve and I think his name was Peter, were sitting beside your bed playing cards." she gives a small laugh at the end of her sentence.

"They stayed with me in the dorm until you came?" I say and my voice gave away that I was a bit surprised.

" Yeah, how come they did? did something happen last night?"

"Oh, um no. I guess they were just watching out for me." I say and smile at the end of them sentence.

"Yeah well you better get dressed if you don't wanna be late."

"you're right." I say and hug and thank her for being by my side.

as I'm walking down the hallway with Caroline and Eric, I can feel myself starting to feel down. my eyes started to get watery for a few seconds or so but it went away. As I walk into class, everybody's almost inside and talking aloud.

I spot Peter and Eve and I make my towards them pushing through a small crowd. I hug Eve, and then I hug Peter. And I feel tears coming down my cheek.

" Thank you guys so much for staying with me last night.." I say and my voice breaks.

"you don't have to thank us." they both finish each other's sentences , and give a warm smile to each other.

" But what happened yesterday? You think you're gonna be okay during class?" Eve asks me.

" Yeah I'll be okay. Can we talk about it during coffee after class or something?" I ask them both.

"definitely" Peter answers for Eve.

I smile and as I start to turn away and head to find my seat, I see Tobias staring at me, and the worst part is, I notice his eyes are bloodshot, just like mine. As I turn from him, I see Evan and he's daydreaming. but he's soon broken from that and I notice we're both making eye contact. I need to talk to him, to hear his voice again, and to press my lips against his. But I figured, right now isn't the best time.

I turn from him as well, and head to the middle section of class and take a seat next to Jace. this is going to be an interesting next hour.

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