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'I'll be your friend till the end , you can send the monsters away . I'll stay by your side, little girl you don't need to run and hide. everything will be okay'
Angelina hated to admit it but her week with axl had been more than great . however everything good must come to an end and all the issues she had been trying to ignore were resurfacing , lingering and tingling in her veins.
a want for her sweet poison was itching away at the younger girl , her mind distracted by how easy it would be to escape, even if for a little while.
the withdrawals were hard and Angelina felt like she could throw up as she stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom breathing as if she had just ran a mile.
lifting her head weakly , she almost gasped in disgust at the reflection staring back at her . she felt so filthy , so sick and so tired.
it seemed that not even axl distracting her with his sweet eyes and charming words were enough to stop her from feeling like she was drowning.
if felt like her senses were heightened , a need for something so dangerous , something so destructive .
she needed to do something before she went insane.
with her eyes wide and her hands trembling she pulled open one of the draws and shuffled through it desperately ,
if she couldn't satisfy her need for ruins then she would have to do something else to fix it , she wanted , no needed to feel in control again .
grabbing a pair of scissors she paused , catching herself in the mirror.
she looked like a doll , a weak pathetic doll and she hated it . her long blond hair was messy and the remains of her makeup was staining her face as she wept.
this wasn't the life she wanted. she didn't want to feel this way , she didn't want to have to rely on heroin to get through her day .
and she didn't want axl to pity her , she didn't want him to think that she couldn't take care of herself . so much so that he felt the need to have her in his home so he could watch over her to make sure she didn't do anything stupid.
as much as he denied it , Angelina knew that there was a small part of him that pitied her. her mind whirling as negative doubts started to crawl back into her head.
all his sweet and kind words, all of his friendly touches. they way he made her feel , it wasn't real .
if they had met a year ago when her daddy was still alive she was certain that he wouldn't be so close with her , that he would have stayed well away from the mess she had created for herself.
