Pause (Published)

Chapter 29: Oh You'd Like That, Wouldn't You?

"Are you ready?" Jay asks from beside me as I grab my bag. I look up him with doubtful eyes, feeling incredibly vulnerable. I nod my head briefly when inside I feel like I'm going to puke from my nerves. Jay sees this, perceptive as always. He can always tell what I'm really feeling. I watch him in distress as he steps forward and places a hand on my shoulder, "You don't have to do this Aqueela. We don't have to go. I don't want you to feel pressured into doing this."

I shrug, "If not now, then when?"

As expected, he understands what I mean by that. If I back out now, I may never have the courage to face her again. Jay offers me a soft smile, the blue hue in his eyes parting like a storm being passed over by sunshine, "I'm proud of you."

Normally I would be unaffected by such a simple sentence, but when those four words come tumbling off Jay's lips my heart skips a beat. Knowing that those words are being directed to me by the most detached person I know, warms my heart...and my face apparently... "I cannot believe you're blushing because I said I'm proud of you." Jay retorts with a mischievous grin appearing on his lips, clearly amused by my flushing.

"Shut up." I snap, not bothering to deny it. Jay's too witty and bright to fall for a lie. 

Jay simply chuckles in response before adding, "No worries. It's kind of cute." He says that to reassure me that I don't have to be embarrassed but it only leads to further blushing as my cheeks grow even more red at the sweet as honey words dripping from his lips. "Too precious." Jay teases as he pinches my cheeks in amusement as if I'm some kind of itsy bitsy baby.

I slap his hands away and advert my eyes away from his penetrating blue ones, "Don't touch me!" I huff, crossing my arms over my chest in the most defensive yet intimidating stance I can muster. 

This time Jay falls silent, sensing that this was no longer a joke. I was actually annoyed with him. "Jeeze." Jay sighs, frustrated, "What's gotten into you to make you so feisty and aggressive all of a sudden? I was only messing with you." 

That's the problem. He'd even said it aloud and failed to realize. I'm sick of him just seeing as me as someone to tease and mess with when he knows better, when he knows the truth behind my blushing.

It's as if we've swapped roles. Now I'm the mopey grumpy one and suddenly Jay has energy and an uplifting beat to his step. Wow, our timing is definitely not impeccable.

"Eela, what wrong?" Oog asks, tugging on my hand gently as if very concerned and no doubt he was.

I glance down at him and feign a smile, "Not now Oog." I say politely, shaking him off me in the nicest way possible. He tends to get possessive over me every once in a  while, especially when Jay's around. Don't get me wrong, he loves Jay, just not as much as he loves me. He's gotten very attached to my presence. It's kind of adorable in a twisted way.

Oog nods, understanding. I'm one of the few he listens to. He backs off whilst growling at Jay who rolls his eyes and seems unfazed, used to Oog backing me up over him. The tension merely thickens when Oog leaves the room.

I'm not stupid. I know Jay knows why I'm irritated. He's not as clueless as most males. He acts like he is, but he knows. He always knows.

Jay grumbles something inaudible beneath his breath before looking at me with a determined gaze. I know that look all too well. He's  ready to apologize, "Aqueela-"

"Save your breath." I say, putting my hand up to block his apology. I didn't want his pity. I just wanted him to return my feelings. Of course I can accept him not feeling the same way. That's fine. What I can't accept is him messing with me when he knows I like him. I don't appreciate being strung along.