Infatuation

7|

You ruined us when you cheated, I don't know why you did it. I don't know why you thought it was ok. I don't know why you continued to smirk at me every day. What did I ever do to you Jude, all I've ever given you is my love and that was how you repayed me. I don't understand why you now want to act like you miss me and like you love me.

It's been hard but I'm trying to move on I don't need your pitiful "I love you's" to make it even harder than it is. I opened up to you Jude, you made me open up to you. You broke me out of my depressed state, you made me feel alive. Even my mum loved you Jude, Even my mum! You promised me that you were okay with the fact that I wasn't ready to have sex yet, you assured me that you would wait "because I'm worth it "

You can keep messing with me. You can't even talk to me face to face thankfully. I've moved to the US with my dad, to start over. My mother is dead, in case you've forgotten. I want to start over and forget all about you. Your in my past, I'd like to keep it that way... I think I do anyway. I'm trying to get over what you did, I'm trying to get over you

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After receiving the notification Nayla had stared at her laptop screen for about 10 minutes, she was so scared of opening to the email. A part of her wanted to find out what it said... But another part of her was afraid of the outcome.

What baffles her was his ability to reply so quickly, too quickly

What if it said something like ok or whatever

Or even worse, imagine if it says I never liked you anyway. Rejection had always been one of Nayla's greatest fears.

Her breathing increased rapidly, she felt like the walls were closing in on her. Her vision was becoming blurry and she felt as if she was about to collapse at any given second.

Place your hands on a flat surface and breathe, take your time, there's no rush.

Nayla's thoughts instantly went back to her old therapist back home and how they used to watch Jane the Virgin together to unwind and de-stress

Inhala, exhala - she said this in her head, quoting the cast of Jane the Virgin

Her heart beat finally dropped to a normal speed and her breathing returned to normal. She sighed in relief, happy that her small panic attack was finally over

It had been a while since Nayla had a panic attack, specifically one induced by her own negative thoughts. She was frustrated as it showed how much of hold Jude had over her and her mental health. Usually he was the one who would calm her down during a panic attack, most times he was able to end it before it even started - calming her down before the situation triggered her anxiety.

In Nayla's attempt to find a flat surface, she must have opened her laptop even further, allowing Jude's message to displayed explicitly on the flat screen.

I miss you, I need you back Nayla, please I need you. If you don't come back to me, I'm afraid I'll have to come to you. I need you in my life.

Nayla quickly closed her computer, not even bothering to shut down the tabs she had open.

She put het laptop in the corner of her room and pulled out her phone.

30 missed calls and 45 messages

Damn, Nayla didn't think Lena would notice that she went missing.

30 missed calls from Lena and 35 messages from unknown number

Turns out the unknown was Luca, how and why he got Nayla's number was a mystery to her.

One message from Lena really stuck out to Nayla, it was a warning, telling her to stay away from Luca, 'he's dangerous'

Nayla hadn't thought of replying but Lena's desperate message peaked her curiosity

Luca was obsessed, infatuated. No one had ever stood up to him like that before. Especially not a girl. He was stunned, confused, to be honest he was slightly angered by the situation.

So when he picked up Lena's phone and copied Nayla's number into his before sending her a message, he was shocked to say the least.

He hated the way she made him feel, in the hallway earlier he wasn't thinking straight. He felt this compulsion to hold her; to touch her.

After school Luca stayed with Lena to wait outside Nayla's locker, but she never came. Due to Lena's little patience the pair ended up leaving, Lena screaming that it would be Luca's fault if anything had happened to Nayla. He simply nodded his head and clenched his fists while she continued to shout at him. He was blocking her out; focusing on maintaining the anger that was boiling below the surface of his skin.

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The journey home in Luca's white Range Rover Sport was silent to say the least, the only sound that could be heard was Lena's acrylic nails furiously tapping away at her phones keyboard - Luca watched Lena from the corner of his eye, he was clearly amused as he saw Lena aimlessly placed call after call and text after text.

Luca's mind subconsciously drifted back to Nayla, savouring the memory and the surge of power he had received when he made Nayla submit to him. Deep inside Luca knew that what he did was unacceptable, but he couldn't help himself. He liked the feeling of being in control, he liked the power and the feeling of superiority he gained from being in charge.

Simply put he was a bit of a control freak. Everything had to go his way. He assumed that his controlling nature was one of the reasons why Nayla compelled and angered him at the same time. He hated that she didn't follow his rules and regulations, no one had ever done that to him before, it intrigued him, he wondered how far he could bend her before she snapped.