In the Wrong Space and Time

III

AS WE STARE AT EACH other, I look the other woman up and down, trying to deduce something, anything, about her.

Frizzy brown hair, dark eyes, olive-toned skin, and a prominent nose that would have looked patriarchal had she been a man, characteristics run through my brain like a computer processing code.

"Are you Jewish?" I ask bluntly.

We finally break the tense eye contact, and Karla shifts into a more relaxed gaze. "Ja, I do look very, um, stereotypisch."

"So, your country is in a bad situation now. How well do you think Hitler's going to keep his promises to restore Germany to its former glory?" I don't beat about the bush, eager to learn about how an ordinary German citizen viewed the dictator.

"Wie bitte? I understand no," Karla responds haltingly.

"Okay, let me try again," my brow furrows as I try to rephrase my sentence. "Weimar government is not good for the country. How well do you think Adolf Hitler will solve Germany's problems?"

"Ah!" Karla's eyes light up, and she begins to chatter away, hope evident in her voice. Unfortunately, only a quick torrent of Deutsch pours forth from her lips, most of which I do not understand.

"Wait, wait!" I beg, holding up my hand to stop her. "I don't know much German. Do you mind speaking in English, please?"

"Sorry, English is not good," comes the disappointing answer.

I think for a while, trying to find a way around the situation. Then, I slap my forehead as the answer comes to me. When all else fails, use Google Translate.

"Karla, you wait here," I address her hurriedly as I rush out of the garage and into my house. I grab my smartphone from the kitchen counter, opening Google Chrome and pulling up a new tab and punching in the words, Google translate: English to German.

I walk back into the garage, holding up my phone for Karla to see. "Okay, Karla, this is a smartphone and I will teach you how to use it."

At her quizzical look, I sigh and input what I had said into the "English" text bar and convert it into Karla's mother tongue. I show Karla the screen and she reads the text in mystified delight.

Standing next to her, I type in the words, What I am typing on is called the keyboard. You use it to put words into one of the text boxes and the phone translates it for you. and press the Translate button.

"Now, you try," I hand her the phone. Karla takes it from me gently, almost reverently, and begins tapping on the screen.

Ich teste nur das.

"No, Karla, that's the English box," I reply, starting to grow impatient. "You type into the other box, and when you're done, press this Translate button."

"Oh." She does so without much ado, and I take the phone back from her to type something else.

Okay, this is what we're going to do. I want information about how you think Hitler is going to help your country and in exchange, I will tell you all about my time machine.

I press Translate and pass the device back to Karla, who nods in understanding. And hence, we commence our conversation.

When translated fully to English, it looked something like this:

Karla: Herr Hitler has made promises to abolish the Treaty of Versailles for us. It is a treaty the League of Nations came up with, and it has many unfair clauses that Germany has to comply with, as punishment for being the aggressor in World War I. He will restore German pride.