All Because of You...

The Reflection of my Life

Warning: This story cautiously uses strong terms.

How I got to this point in my life is a journey I'll never wish to take ever again. A journey that belittled me so much that I almost lost the one part in my life that's to give me strength along the way

According to my long lost birth paper, I'm Nina Lamber. Been wanting to change that last name to Mason. What the heck! I don't even know the face to whom my last name belongs.
And my mom...
Ha...
My own flesh and blood threw me out of the house at age ten. Why? After so many years... I really don't care anymore.
But one thing was for sure. She chose that money man over me. ME! Her own daughter! He wasn't even good looking.

I became a street kid. Roaming the earth like a mad person. I was a mess. Inside out. For three whole months, I was without care and supervision.

Then a month later I was living at an orphanage. They took me in, cleaned me up... I was like fresh food on the market. I felt good. So good. Hahaha. It was An institution we were to call our temporary 'home'. Home my ass... Let me tell you, that place was hell for orphans and other kids. Worst than Juvie. Orphans and kids including myself were being beat up every. single. day. by other kids. The food was disgusting! As if the cook brought her personal problems for the recipe... I vividly remember we were forced to our beds as soon as the orphanage was closed at 5pm. And hear me when I say this, we kids were the janitors, though they had janitors. And everything had to be done before that time for bed.

There were over two hundred of us there and counting. I watched as kids would enter and go. Some into a seemingly wonderful family. Some family that had kid, or kids of there own. Some into the hands of an obvious reckless couple with an internal mark on there forehead that says 'CHILD ABUSE!'
And to my pain, I Nina Suana Lamber on the 16th of October 2007, at 4:30pm was confirmed into the hands of one of those Abusive couple both large and thick in body, seemingly to be in their mid forty. After I've waited for a very, very, very, long one year and six months.

I waved with tears to my one good friend of all the many kids. Her name was, Shyra. A little 4 year old. She never spoke. Not one word in all my time being at that orphanage. I met her there and had her as my little sister. She was crying, I remember... I also remember running back to her and hugging her not wanting to let go. I was subbing. She was my only family.

"Don't cry Shyra," I was trying to soothe her. Trying to make her feel that everything was going to be ok. But even I myself wasn't convinced seeing the many horrible things I was leaving her in. "You'll have many friends ok... I love yo-" before I would complete my last farewell speech, I was pulled away by my sole call adopting mother. "Come along little one" She said with a stern and giggling voice while discreetly squeezing my wrist taking me to the outdoor to leave.

It was happening so fast that without thinking I started shouting in tears. "Who's gonna protect Shyra? Who's gonna read her the pumpkin and the bear? Please-" I was terrified. She was terrified. I didn't want to leave her behind. And even though I didn't trust my new family. I was willing to take the risk of Shyra being apart of it. Even if it meant I had to continue protecting her with all my life, for the rest my life. "Let me go! Let me go..." My voice was breaking. The next thing I knew, was an intense pinch right under my arm. That again confirmed to me that this couple, was a next chapter in my life, from the book of hell.

The couple had a black SUV. I was forced in by the woman. And as soon as she settled in. The man drove off. My face was red, my nose was purple, my bright brown eyes were watery and swollen. My dark brownish Coco hair was loosened and in my face. With a splitting headache, I kept silent. I was just there staring through the window holding back the tears, trying to ease the ache preparing for the drama I was sure waiting ahead of me. It was a dead silent ride. No stops. No turn offs. Both their eyes were fixated on the road, all the way.