You've been traveling with the Doctor already for three years and you never had any fights like this. Yeah, you argued few times but it never mattered.
"Why are you so mad about it?" it seemed like the Doctor had gone crazy, he was walking to the console and back to you for fifteen minutes already "I told you that I can't save them, I can't because it's the past and if you were paying enough attention on your history classes you’d know it too!"
"You're a time traveler! You... you can just go back in time, you always do this! How do you think you saved me? How do you think you saved yourself? I know you can do this but..." you were already screaming at him.
Your dirty because of the dust, your hands were shaking and your hair were absolutely mess. You felt a tear fall down on your cheek so you quickly removed it with your hand, leaving a bit of dust there.
"But I guess you're not better than Daleks. You're just the same" you gritted teeth and looked at him with the bravest face you could do now.
That's when the Doctor stopped... it was right when he finished walking to the console. He put his head down, thinking. You could see him slowly biting his lip as his eyes were running through the whole console.
"Then why are you still here?" He finally spoke, raising his head. He slowly started walking to you and this time there was something new in his eyes, it wasn't anger as you expected... it was something sad but more than that "It's been three years, Y/N... Why are you here with me?"
You didn't expect him to ask this, not after all her screams and accusations. To be honest, you didn't mean to say the last thing... the Doctor was not anything like Daleks, it just came out your mouth to make him angry.
"What do you mean?" You asked really quietly, not knowing if he did even hear you.
"You can leave me any moment... Why are you still here if you think I'm the monster?" said the Doctor with a confident voice but you never trusted his words.
Always look into the Doctor's eyes when you speak to him. They will tell you the truth.
The only thing you learned from traveling with him. And this time, when he said this, you looked right into his eyes and you saw it... you literally saw his heart breaking as he said this word. The monster...
You felt new tears fill your eyes and you frowned feeling infinite pain in your chest.
"You're not the monster, Doctor..." you made a little step towards to him, expecting that he will step back but he stayed... he was just standing there and looking at you. "Listen..." you started but suddenly felt like you’re forgetting how to breath "Please just listen to me... I'm really sorry for saying that, you know I can say things like these sometimes when I'm mad... and you know how much I hate myself for that. You have never been a monster, not in my eyes and..." a sob left your lips and you closed your eyes, trying to make your breath calm again "And I..." you couldn't finish this sentence, it felt like your own body was stopping you from saying it.
You looked at the screen, there the city was burning... You knew how is it going to end because it all was history to you. But looking at all those people now and seeing them burning alive made your heart squeeze so hard that you wanted to stop their struggles and you know he can do it... but you also know it’s not allowed.
You looked at him again and noticed that his eyes changed. He was looking at you, all this time. It was almost impossible to look at him back, not after what you said. You wanted him to say something or do something so bad, like literally anything! You would be so grateful if he screamed at you now or started running through the TARDIS... anything, literally anything.
"Why are you here, Y/N?" asked the Doctor again but this time, much softer and it didn't make it any easier.
"I don't know..." it was a lie, you knew exactly why you're still here and why you could never leave.
Doctor pressed his lips and nodded "Then... I guess let's find out" he smirked at your confused face and pressed a few bottoms.
"What... what are you doing?" your eyes widened as you heard the sound of TARDIS moving.
"Changing the history" and here it is, here's this crazy adorable smile that you missed so much "Hold tight, the universe is going to be really disappointed in us"
You did it. You and Doctor saved the city. You changed the history. You broke the universe's rules... No... He broke the universe's rules for you.
"Do you know now? Why you're here?" asked Doctor again as he started slowly approaching to you.
You opened your mouth to say something but couldn't. You wanted to tell him this so bad but the fear of being rejected was keeping you back.
"I do... I always knew" you decided start with this.
"So what's the reason?" he was so concentrate on your eyes as he said that.
"Don't make me say this first" you let out a sob and closed your eyes, it was too much. You've never been so afraid in your whole life... You just wanted this to be some kind of dream, you just wanted to wake up and travel with Doctor as you always used to.
You heard him slowly walking up to you and after his hands on your shoulders. "You're shaking... Hey, Y/N... Please, look at me" he carefully raised your face and you opened your eyes "Here we go, love" he smiled with the sweetest smile ever and kissed your forehead "Let me tell you something first then, okay?"
He definitely waited for you to give an answer so you just nodded, talking right now would be useless.
"I know why you're so scared telling me this... believe me, I'm just the same scared now" he took a deep breath and looked right into your eyes "I love you... I love you Y/N Y/L/N"
As soon as he said that, the Doctor let out the biggest sigh of relief and you started to wonder since when he was keeping this from you.
After you noticed the Doctor's smile slowly fading out because you still just standing there and staring at him "Doctor..." you started as realized that this is the end, this is the finish line... that's there their friendship will end and you were scared as hell but you couldn't see his heart breaking once again "I love you too"
You couldn't see the Doctor's reaction because everything was blurry from tears in your eyes. But you knew that he was smiling... You felt that on his lips as he kissed you. The Doctor put one his arm around your neck to pull you closer as much as possible and another on your waist.
As soon as you pulled away, you looked at him "You won't believe how long I waited for this..." he said and put your hands on his face "Why we haven't said this earlier?"
"I guess because we're the stupidest creatures in the whole universe" you smiled bright at him as he put both his hands on your waist.
"Or just the ones most in love”
