A Single Daffodil [Harry Styles]

Lebron's Advice II.

The days following the Teddy-Harry incident were cruel and painful. Turns out when you get roofied by a prick, 95% of your healthy immune system gets cornered and you get hit by full-blown cold—I forced Jayden to check my symptoms on WebMD when I started to feel a fever. The results told us it was either typical cold or cancer...so we went ahead and speculated that it was just the cold.

I didn't leave the hotel room for three days. I spent all my time tucked away in my bed, living off of NyQuil, Gatorade and English tea. The first two days were a complete blur because the medicine kept me knocked out for the majority of the day and throughout the whole night. Sometimes I'd wake up and find Jayden and Sophia on the other bed, watching TV, other times I'd wake up to a completely dark and empty bedroom. It was exhausting being this sick. My throat felt like sandpaper, my cough was killing me, my nose was stuffy and my whole body ached. It seemed like nowadays, nothing good was ever going to come my way.

By the third morning of being cooped up in the hotel, my fever finally broke and I was somewhat on the lesser side of delirious. I had been up early in the morning, around 8 o'clock, watching the morning news and admiring the small vase of flowers on the vanity next to it. They were hand-picked flowers from Graham and were given to Jayden last night when he was on his way up to check on me.

"I swear you become friends with everyone, Vita, even when you don't try." I vaguely remember Jayden making a comment as he placed the flowers on the vanity. "These are from Graham. From downstairs? He told me to tell you to feel better soon."

I gave Jayden a sleepy smile before falling back asleep.

Now I could fully sit up and actually look at them. There weren't many flowers in the vase, only a couple of Pansies, two or three Marigolds and one lovely blush-colored rose. I smiled because I knew Graham didn't drain the sap out of the rose so the flowers wouldn't last another twenty-four hours (sap kills). Which was fine because, after all, it was the thought that counts.

While the news anchors signed off and the beginning credits of today's Olympic games came on, I sighed and pulled the duvet up to my chin. I didn't let myself dwell on the two accidents a couple of days ago because my illness easily numbed out any type of thought process I could have had. But now that my mind was a little more clear, I couldn't stop thinking about...well, everything. The bruises on my elbows were turning an ugly yellowy/blue color and my stomach dropped somewhere near my feet anytime I recalled the last conversation I had with Harry. 

It was painfully apparent that I wore my heart on my sleeve during that argument. I told him everything I didn't want him to know, and a little more. Everything was a mess.

The soft click of a key inserting into the door and Sophia's loud voice interrupted my thoughts abruptly. "Hola, chica! Are you decent? You have visitors!"

"Yes." My voice croaked before my throat tickled, causing a fit of uncontrollable—and uncomfortable, may I add—coughs.

"Look who we bumped into at breakfast downstairs," Jayden said as he sauntered into the room.

"Lil Spo!" Chris Bosh, the unusually tall giant, was the second one to enter the room, clad in his usual workout gear and Nike flip flop-sock combo. Behind him, Lebron James and Dwayne Wade were dressed in a smilier get up. "Where have you been!?"

I felt my face instantly light up when I saw them. I felt like a little kid in a candy shop. "Guys!"

Lebron and Dwayne made themselves right at home by flopping at the end of my bed. Chris Bosh fell flat on Sophia's bed with his stomach facing down and his long lanky legs dangling off the edge.

"Heard you were sick, Lil' Spo." Lebron reached over and patted my duvet-covered leg twice. "What's that about?"

"Yeah, we missed you at the game last night, kiddo," Dwayne added.

"I missed you too," I told them with all honesty. When these guys were around, it felt like I was home. They were exactly what I needed right now. "But you guys didn't have to visit! I don't need my dad blaming me for getting you guys sick during the Olympics."

"Oh please." Lebron rolled his eyes while Dwayne and Chris laughed. "It would take a lot more than your icky-ass germs to disrupt this beautiful machinery." He motioned toward his body with pride.

I rolled my eyes even though I was laughing.

"Speaking of your dad!" Sophia piped up. "Did he come up here yet?"

"Here? As in my hotel room?" I shook my head. "No, he hasn't."

Sophia swung her head over to the vanity, where Jayden was perched. They shared a look of what I immediately recognized as sympathy.

"Why?" I questioned.

"We bumped into him downstairs while we were getting breakfast," Jayden answered. "We told him you've had a cold and that you haven't felt your best recently, to which he said he would come to check on you."

I chewed on the inside of my left cheek as I glanced down at the balled-up tissue I had in my hand. The feeling of disappointment in my father, yet again, made itself a home right inside my bones. As always, my dad picked his job over me and placed me on the back burner. I wasn't even surprised.

"Lil Spo, you know how Coach gets." Chris tried to reason in a soft approaching tone, even though we were all thinking the same thing. "He's determined to bring home that gold for us."

"Yeah, I know." I croaked back before reaching over to the bedside table and grabbing another tissue. I blew into it and rubbed my red irritated nose. "It's whatever."

I could feel everyone staring at me with fierce sympathy. I condemned the idea of people feeling sorry for me. I absolutely hated it. It made me feel small and weak, and those are two things I never wanted to be associated with. I was desperate to change the subject.

"So when's the next game?" I asked quickly.

"Tomorrow night," Lebron answered in a tone that was quite passive, almost sounding like he didn't want to continue on the subject. In which case, meant only one thing: he wanted to get real with me. "Hey kid, are you okay? Like, really okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine." I said. "It's just a cold. Nothing too serious."

I made the wrong decision in looking at Lebron while I said it because I could tell right then and there that he could see through my lie. I should have known that lying to Lebron's face was a no-go. He could read anyone like an open book, no matter how guarded or tall the walls you built around you were. In my case, I had huge boulders and he could still see through them like glass. Shiny, smudge-free glass.

I looked over at Dwayne, Chris, even Jayden, and Sophia too. They were all giving me the same look. No one was buying it.

"Okay, I'm not fine," I admitted a little reluctantly. "My Grandpa died, I have the shittiest relationship with my dad, and I can't tell where my ex-boyfriend stands when it comes to me and his feelings. Everything sucks. All I want is to have fun with my best friends and you guys." I motioned to the three of them. "We're in fucking London, England and here I am, cooped up in the hotel room. I feel like I'm not doing anything right."

"Hey!" Jayden immediately protested. "You are doing everything right. You're making an effort."

"Kid's right, yo." Chris jerked his head in Jayden's direction. "Someone really important to you just passed away and you're not letting grief or depression repress you. You're getting up every day and you're talking and you're trying."

Everyone else nodded in agreement with Chris as I anxiously picked at my nails.

"I just didn't realize-" I paused to let out a wicked cough. Being sick sucks. "I didn't realize it would be this hard."

"It's always hard, Spo," Lebron said. "But that's what life is about, you know? It's always going to have its ups and its downs. And it's like riding a bicycle. In order to keep your balance, you have to keep moving." He patted my leg once more before continuing. "And please, for the love of God, Vita, do not mislead yourself into thinking that grieving is a sign of weakness. I can see that you're trying to avoid it but if you do that, it'll destroy you, Vita. Don't let it destroy you."

I ran a hand through my greasy locks and nodded silently to let him know that I understood. Lebron was telling me everything I already knew, but it held such a different meaning when it came from a different perspective. And he was so right. Grieving is an important process that needs to happen. I was just struggling with finding the right way to do it.

As if Dwayne could read my thoughts, he added onto what Lebron said. "You know, when I was first drafted into the Miami Heat in 2005, I was only a little older than you. About twenty-three years old."

"I remember that so well because Sophia had the biggest crush on you," I interjected, smirking in Sophia's direction. "Stupid idiot thought she could court you at the ripe age of twelve."

Everyone started laughing as Sophia cursed me in Spanish.

"Well I don't know if you guys remember this, but I lost my cousin that same year." Dwayne got serious again. "He lived in Chicago, he was walking home one day and he got murdered for no reason. Someone just came up and shot him."

"Shit, dude." Lebron sighed while I shook my head in disbelief.

"I remember that going down actually," Chris added as he looked up in thought. Both Chris Bosh and Dwayne Wade were drafted into the Miami Heat the same year. I remember it well because my dad was so happy about it. He would take me out for ice cream every day after basketball practice that year.

"Yeah, I was devastated because I lost my best friend," Dwayne said. "I didn't know how to handle his death and play in the NBA at the same time. I really struggled to keep my emotions off the court. But my Mama told me I needed to find a way to cope with it or it would eat me alive. Well if there was one thing you needed to know about my cousin, it was that he loved sailing. It was his favorite thing to do growing up. So the year he passed away, anytime I felt myself missing him, I'd go sailing. Just straight up, go out there in the bay and sail for hours. I mean, I never recovered from my loss but sailing out there, experiencing what he loved most, really helped me cherish his life. I was able to celebrate him as a person and just gain a deeper awareness of how lucky I was to have him in my life."