4. A Grimm Guide to Shade

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Soon after the end of the inauguration ceremony, the first-year students were assigned their dorm rooms. Illia and Sasha, after some asking around, managed to convince the person in charge of the dorms to let them be roommates. They navigated their way through the large and plainly decorated dorm building until they finally found their room, room 302. The room was as barren and plain as the rest of the dorm, although the smell of fresh paint still lingered. The walls were an inoffensive beige and the wooden floor was a warm shade of dark brown. Sasha dropped her bags by the entrance and did an inspection of the room. She dragged her finger across the furniture, checked the window frames, inspected the adjacent bathroom. She returned, mildly disgusted. This... worried Illia.

(Illia): "I'm afraid to ask..."

(Sasha): "Dust..."

(Illia): "...I beg your pardon?"

Sasha took one of her bags and removed a comically large spray bottle full of what will be referred to as "Cleaning Agent" from now on. Sasha squinted her eyes at Illia.

(Sasha): "Unacceptable amounts of dust. And the back of the toilet... there are spider webs in the corners and in the closet."

Sasha marched solemnly into the bathroom with her bag and came out donning what can only be described as "maid commando". A large duster at her hip, cans of air freshener in a bandoleer, her bottle of cleaning agent next to the duster and a small bag with a bio-hazard symbol slung on her shoulder. Her face was masked behind a surgical mask and heavy rubber gloves enveloped her fingers. She wore her maid outfit and a large apron. Illia stared wide-eyed in abject confusion while Sasha glumly asked her to leave. She had a job to do and didn't want her in the way. Illia shuffled out the room awkwardly and Sasha locked the door behind her. Illia stared at the door with mouth agape before her ring tone snapped her out of it. The display showed a picture of Baron with a scribbled goatee and moustache and stink lines. The words "Baron Fuck-Face" hung above the childishly modified photo. She answered her boss's call while still staring at the door.

(Illia): "Yeah boss?"

Baron took a moment to process the new nickname.

(Baron): "First off, since when do you call me boss?"

Illia shrugged.

(Illia): "I'll call you whatever I want."

(Baron): "Right... second, you busy? I'm bored."

(Illia): "What am I, your personal court jester?"

Baron dodged the question.

(Baron): "Answer the question."

(Illia): "Well, Sasha locked herself in the room."

Baron inhaled sharply through the microphone.

(Baron): "Yeouch."

(Illia): "From what I saw, she has full intent on cleaning every nook and cranny."

(Baron): "And you think this because?"

(Illia): "She's packing a maid outfit and enough cleaning supplies to bleach the whole place white."

Baron became silent for a moment before answering.

(Baron): "You lost me at maid outfit."

Illia's shoulders slumped and her eyes narrowed.

(Illia): "You're the worst."

(Baron): "Oh my! How did you get to this conclusion?"

Illia didn't want to deal with his bullshit at the moment and ended the call. She sighed and walked out of the dorm where Baron waited for her.

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