Monster: AOTx"Mute" Reader [Cover By: @sushimisfit]

Chapter 15 (Rewritten)

After the events that occurred, training ended earlier as expected. 

And you felt horrible. 

"It's alright, Y/n. It wasn't your fault."

"Mmm..." You groaned while putting your face in your knees. 

"By the way, are you alright? I've noticed something different. Like you seem a lot more tense." 

Petra being as observant as ever towards you. 

You avoided eye contact and furrowed your eyebrows. 

You let out a frustrated sigh. 

You don't know. You don't know why you're acting like this. Why you were suddenly having flashbacks to a past you don't even remember. 

"Maybe you're stressed about the whole thing. Being trained by the Captain is probably adding pressure to you."

Yeah...it could be that. 

"But you shouldn't be stressed, shouldn't be pressured. You're still a kid, remember? You still have years ahead of you to improve and get better. Besides, things have been peaceful for the most part. You have a lot of time to relax and reflect."

You finally looked at her and gave her a weak smile. 

Maybe she was right...

"Cadet L/n." Captain called you. 

You and Petra both looked at each other nervously before you got up and made your way over. 

"I need to speak to you privately for a moment. The rest of you, make your way to the mess hall."

"Yes sir!" Your squad mates left and soon it was just you and the Captain. 

Captain sighed and his attention turned to you. 

"You improved quite a bit for the past few days, cadet. But now I see there's something holding you back."

You looked away. 

"You're afraid."

Your eyes widened as you looked at the Captain, he was looking back at you. 

"You're afraid of becoming stronger, aren't you?"

Your heart began to thump faster as you looked down at the ground. 

The times that you've been training, you always felt some sort of fear holding you back. 

Something told you you're a lot stronger than you seem, and that strength scared you. Ever since that fight with Annie, when you blacked out. 

Even after Reiner separated you, you still wanted to keep going. Keep attacking her until she couldn't get up. 

And with Commander Shadis, you almost lost yourself. When he landed a hit, it triggered a rage inside of you. 

It wasn't until after you thought about the fight that you realized that wasn't normal. 

You looked at the Captain again before slowly nodding your head. 

Captain said nothing before he looked away. 

"Then I guess our next course of action will be learning control..." He continued. 

"I won't tell you to stop being afraid, after all, we're all afraid of something. But you can't let fear get in the way of succeeding. If you're afraid of getting stronger, afraid of going too far. Then you need to work around that fear."

"Learn to find your self-control."

Is that...an order?

You slowly nodded.