Chasing Elliott - Published

chapter thirty eight ... can't be unseen

Zemblanity (n.)
the inevitable discovery of what we would rather not know; the opposite of serendipity.
———

one week later...

"I'm really sorry, Elli, but please don't shut me out. I didn't mean what I said and I'm sorry I hurt you. Please just call me back." Deleting the hundredth voicemail that Cooper had left me, I sat my phone on the coffee table.

I heard quiet whispers outside the door and rolled my eyes as I shook my head before turning on the television. Ever since our blowout Kingsley and Benjamin went out of their way to make sure they weren't being affectionate or cute around me, even though I told them it honestly didn't bother me at all.

"Okay, I'll ask," Kingsley whispered before she closed the door. Turning around, she jumped slightly as she saw me sitting on the couch.

"What is it you are going to ask me?" I questioned as a small smile tugged at my lips. Kingsley sighed as she walked around the chair and fell onto the couch next to me.

"There's a party tonight and we were wondering if you wanted to come with us," she said sheepishly as she slowly looked over at me.

Sighing, I ran a hand through my hair. "I just don't know if I'm in the mood, honey. I'm sorry."

Kingsley looked at me with an apologetic smile before she stood up from the couch and made her way down the hall toward her room. Turning my attention back to the television, I heard my phone begin to ring again. Groaning, I reached for it and hit decline when I saw his name pop up.

"He's a mess, you know," Kingsley said quietly from the hallway. "He misses you like crazy and feels like shit about how everything went down."

"Well maybe he shouldn't have told me that this isn't our time," I fired back as my emotions started bubbling up again.

"Honey," she started to say as she walked over and knelt in front of me, grabbing my hands in hers. "He said that in the heat of the moment, he didn't actually mean it. I've been talking to him and I know that it wasn't true. He loves you, El and I think you should just talk to him."

"I don't even know what I'd say," I mumbled sadly as I looked down at our entwined hands.

Kingsley released a weak breath before she squeezed my hands. "How about you start with saying you're sorry and finally telling him you love him?"

I looked at her with slightly scrunched eyebrows but not because of what she was proposing - but because for once the thought of telling him I loved him didn't scare me to my very core. As if noticing this, Kingsley smiled softly at me as she pushed herself up to stand and disappeared back to her room.

———

I sat at my makeup vanity as I stared at myself in the mirror. Kingsley and Benjamin had left about an hour ago and I was debating whether I go meet them or go look for Cooper. On one hand, I think a night out to clear my head and not think about the situation for a few hours would benefit me, and on the other I didn't want to go any longer without him.