Numb

"We lost him", the voice
quivered from the cell.
My heart clenched, death
was inevitable, so was pain.

I thought of the very morning,
sprinting to catch up the
visitors hour. Doctors had
hope then, oh, how time flies.

I thought of the things I
wanted to say, the things I
wanted to do, all an obscure
dream now.

"Don't you dare wail and
whimper over there," my so
called mother hissed. I nodded,
eyes fixated on the gloomy sky,
wondering, if they too, were in
pain for the lost soul.

I did not move from the
secluded corner, eyes upon the
veiled body, refusing to blink.
The sea of people swarming in,
to pay their final respects.

I wished for the pain to
embrace, for this numbness
was exhausting. Tears poured,
but no sound came, heart
constricted, but no pain came.

"No tears on the corpse," the
monotone voice said. I hastily
wiped mine. I stared at his
lifeless face longingly, still
beautiful somehow, and
pressed a kiss on his forehead,
flinching at the strange
coldness.

They carried him on their shoulders,
and took him away.

I wondered if this gaping hole,
this numbness, would ever
fade away.