westward grove

seven

I sat at a table, surrounded by Zayn, Niall, Liam, and Lauren. I was nervous, and inevitably twitchy. My leg bounced up and down as I took long sips of my martini. I tried my best to focus on the dancers, making direct eye contact with Dinah. She noticed and winked, but I didn't avert my eyes.

"Are you alright?" Niall asked, dragging me out of my anxiety filled daze. I realized that the other four other inhabitants of the table were staring at me. I nodded my head and flashed a forced smile. "We're not gonna embarrass you, if that's what you're worried about."

That wasn't what I was worried about at all. I was nervous about my girlfriend and Lauren meeting. My feelings towards Lauren were becoming more and more undeniable, and the way we interacted reflected that. Normani wasn't the most observant person, but I was deathly afraid that she'd pick up on something.

Normani was coming down to the club to meet my friends today, something I definitely wasn't ready for. "Just be cool, okay?" I requested, deciding to run with Niall's assumption. "Normani is black, you know?" I could not think of a single fucking valid reason for bringing that up again.

"And you're from Cuba. And Niall is from Ireland. And Zayn is from England. And Liam is from England. And I'm Cuban." Lauren stated, both of her eyebrows raised. "Race isn't an issue here, we're all ethnic."

Zayn indefinitely picked up on why I was uneasy. His eyes often found way mine, though I refused to meet them. I kept mine glued to Dinah, despite her now obvious discomfort. She sent me multiple questioning looks. "Camila?" He asked.

"Zayn," I replied flatly, not looking at him.

"Niall," Liam said jokingly.

"Liam," Niall replied.

"Lauren," Liam said, attempting to bring her into the banter.

Lauren didn't reply.

"Camila," Zayn repeated.

"Niall," Niall chimed in.

"Holy fucking shit, guys." Lauren interrupted, bringing an end to their fun. "Camila is obviously fucking nervous. Can you be a little sensitive for once in your life?"

My heart fluttered and a wave of butterflies flew through my stomach. Lauren sticking up for me was both incredibly sweet, and unbearably hot. I flashed her a soft smile before standing up. "I'm gonna go outside and smoke." I told the table, only to have Lauren nonchalantly point at the ceiling. I knew exactly what she meant.

I made my way through the crowded club, dodging the men and strippers that littered the large space. Eventually, I made my way to the forbidden staircase, which was strategically hidden in a broom closet. I bolted up the steps, eager to get some fresh air. Once on top of the roof, I sat down on the lawn chair and lit a cigarette. I had Lauren to thank for reintroducing me to the habit, but I had to admit, it was vice I missed.

I stared out at the ocean, though it wasn't as beautiful as usual. Today was gloomy, which reflected my mood well. Ever since Lauren and I had spent time together outside of work, I'd found myself feeling tired and anxious. Tired, because every interaction I had with Normani became forced. Anxious, because I knew things had to change, and I didn't what it was I needed to do, exactly.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the door closing behind me. There was only one other person who knew about the rooftop oasis, and I was expecting her to come up.

Rather than taking a seat on the table next to my right like last time, Lauren opted for sitting on the lawn chair with me. Our bodies were touching, and I desired nothing more than to entwine our fingers. My longing for physical contact was almost completely drowned out by my need for emotional connection. I wanted to know everything about her- her talents, passions, pet peeves. I'd been granted a very small window peeking into her life, but I aimed to expand it.