Convergence - The Last Science #2.2 - Heroes and Villains

B2: Chapter 32 - Paranoia - II

  Natalie only had time to leave a single mouse out for Percy before she rushed out the door the next day. Her lunch nearly fell out of her hands as she ran after Quinn. They were late for the bus, and it was mostly her fault. She'd been trying to calm Percy down, who really didn't enjoy being cooped up inside a tiny closet all day. Natalie had let him out at night, but come morning, she couldn't take the chance that the Kincaids find him.

  They caught the bus just in time. Natalie hurried past the driver—who still hadn't stopped giving her the scar-stare—and made her way to the back of the bus as usual. To her surprise, the rear two seats weren't unoccupied. A few kids she didn't know had taken one side, playing some game on their phones. Natalie sat down across from them at the window in her usual spot, but it meant Quinn wouldn't be sitting across from her.

  Nor would Quinn be able to sit anywhere near, she realized with a shock. The next five rows were already full. Apparently, the back of the bus was suddenly way more popular than she'd remembered. Quinn glanced around, trying to figure out where to sit, but none of the other kids noticed.

  "Sit here," said Natalie finally, tapping the seat next to her.

  "You sure?" he asked, glancing at her.

  No, but I'd rather have you close than way up there. She nodded quickly, not meeting his eyes.

  Quinn sat down, as close to the edge as he could, but between their bags and everything else, it wasn't that far away. Their driver was a real stickler for legs in the aisle and staying in his seat, and Natalie didn't want to draw any more attention to them. "Closer," she murmured. "You're sticking out."

  Quinn scooted closer, and Natalie felt a shiver travel up through her spine. The darkness was back, slithering into her vision, her heart pounding harder than before. She bunched herself against the wall of the bus, putting her backpack between the two of them.

  I just want to sit next to him! she shouted inside her skull. Why can't I just have that?

  You must never let anyone near.

  I hate you, she cried—and in fact, she did feel a tear in her eye. Natalie blinked furiously, trying to get rid of it without using her hand, so Quinn wouldn't notice. She stared pointedly out the window, away from him. I want to go back. Just let me go back.

  "Natalie?" Quinn whispered, so quiet that she wouldn't have heard him without magic.

  Hearing her name calmed her down, much more than he'd ever know. Natalie took a deep breath, and then another. She turned to Quinn and nodded. She knew who she was. She was here, with her boyfriend, on the bus to school, and she was going to be okay. Someday.

  Right on cue, the bus grinded to a halt, and Blake Sinclair got on board.

  Natalie didn't pay her much attention at first. After all, she usually sat toward the front, even though she was an eighth grader. She never came this far into the bus. Except today was different. Natalie knew it even before Blake had made it halfway back. Today was not going to be okay.

  "Jenny!" she called, still a few rows out.

  Natalie jerked around from staring out the window, locking eyes with her. "Hi, Blake."

  "We were so worried about you."

  Fat chance. "Why?"

  Blake smirked, though to the rest of the bus it probably looked like an honest smile. "When you missed school yesterday, I thought you might have, you know, tried again."

  What? What does that even mean? Natalie glanced away, not at all sure what Blake meant. "I had a family thing," she said, giving the excuse they'd all agreed on. "I was excused."

  "Well, I'm glad you're back. I bet Quinn is too," she added, glancing at him. "You two are such a cute couple, you know?"

  Quinn glanced up from his book. "What?"

  "I was just saying, I don't think I've ever seen a couple like you. Quinn, you must be the nicest guy ever, with how close you two are."

  Natalie flinched. She wondered if Quinn knew what Blake meant. She glanced over at him. It was only for a second, just a flash, but Natalie saw him wince. He got it...

  Against every instinct in her body, with her brain screaming at her to stop, Natalie reached out and took Quinn's hand. She wrapped her fingers in between his, each one like it was scorching her skin, but she held on. She held on tight, and glared at Blake straight in the eyes, trying to express every ounce of hatred she felt churning in her stomach.

  "Thanks."

  Blake's eyebrows narrowed, but she didn't say another word. She turned in a huff and marched back down the bus to join her friend Lydia. Natalie turned back to the window, watching the sidewalk roll by, still clutching Quinn's hand as tight as she could. He felt warm and soft, but anything she might have liked was overwhelmed by the trembling, agonizing pain of being so close to another person.

  Let go. You're only hurting yourself.

  No.

  You're hurting him, too.

  I'm not letting go.

  Natalie kept her grip, and Quinn didn't say a word. All the way to school, right up until the bus thumped to a halt at the student exit, Natalie held on tight. Only once they stood up did she finally let go.

  She didn't look at Quinn once the whole way inside. He murmured a question, but Natalie didn't hear it. Her ears were filled with a rushing sound, like a raging waterfall that wouldn't stop flowing, and her stomach churned like a whirlpool.

  The moment she was inside, Natalie bolted for her bathroom. She locked the door and clambered into her stall, heaving. Breakfast erupted from her mouth, barely landing in the toilet. Her heart was still racing, and every inch of her skin buzzed with energy. Her mouth tasted like acid. Natalie fell back onto the tiled floor, coughing hard. She wiped her face with a scrap of toilet paper, then curled up against the stall door, head on her knees, and rocked back and forth, hands pressed to her face.

  She'd done it. She'd held Quinn's hand, all the way to school. It hurt—it hurt so much more than she imagined it could—but she'd gotten through it.