I DIDN'T PLAN FOR ANY of this to happen.
I don't know what I was thinking. Maybe I wasn't. I had no idea that my walls were slowly being breached.
Sex. Drugs. Alcohol.
That was the cycle. The norm. I had become so used to it that I never saw you coming. The high, the pleasure, and the emptiness of the aftermath.
I'd convinced myself that that was me being in control of my life, which was rare. I'd feel everything in my own terms, and I was content with being miserable.
But you fucking came along.
Like a magnet, I was drawn to you.
I flirted with you. I never flirt. Everything about you was different; I was attracted to your quaint energy.
I became curious. A feeling that I hadn't experienced in such a long time. Maybe I wanted to stick around, just for a while, to uncover your thoughts and feelings about the entire universe.
I'll always remember the day I lay on your chest for the very first time. I was so used to restless nights but somehow managed to fall asleep. A beautiful kind of slumber, giving a moment's rest to my weary mind.
The feeling of security that your arms provided me was unmatched. I felt safe and okay. The world was quiet for once and I could think clearly.
I pressed my face reflexively against your neck, breathing deep your smell, marvelling at the beat of your pulse against my palm.
"You make me happy," you breathed against my skin.
I smiled gently but didn't speak. I wondered how a girl like me could possibly have that effect on you.
Tentatively, you reached down closing the distance between us, your lips brushing against mine, ever so slightly, as if half afraid I would push you away.
The kiss was as light as a feather, making my body feel completely weightless.
You kissed me harder. Like I was an oasis that you were drinking from after wandering in the desert for too long. You broke off the kiss, our breathing hitched and I felt like I was coming down from a high, a high that I wasn't ready to let go of yet.
I moved back towards you, pulling you to me, my lips finding yours once again, one arm wrapping around your neck. You kissed me back just as hungrily, sending flames of passion searing up my spine.
And just like that, you ignited a flame deep within me. A fire that would burn and burn, till it eventually consumed me.
I need you to understand that I wasn't looking for you when I first met you.
You came into my life like a raging storm.
And left destruction in your wake.
