It Must Have Been The Wind(Trixya)

Chapter 21:Trixie

Trixie's POV
I sat next to Katya on the bathroom floor, her head laid on my shoulder. "Um, I have my first therapy appointment today."

"Do you?"

"Yeah, I looked through the list you gave me and picked one. It is later today at 5. I'm kinda scared." Katya grabbed my hand and looked in my eyes.

"It's okay, you don't have to go."

"I don't have to but I need to. I have a lot that I need to work through and I don't want to throw it all on you."

"I understand." I smiled at Katya and hugged her.

"I'll be okay, I promise."

"I know you will, and thank you." I pulled back from the hug a little.

"For what?"

"Helping me, talking to me, just sitting with me."

"Oh, it's nothing."

"For me it is something. I've always had to help others and basically handle my problems on my own. Can I tell you something?" I nodded my head as I looked at Katya. "It is nice to have someone be here and not judge me. I used to be into drugs really bad. When I first tried them I told myself, I wouldn't get addicted. I said I would keep my shit together but that shit is easier said than done. It is way easier to get sucked in. I had a rough time in my life a while back so I got deeper in the drugs, it was a way to escape the outside world of pain. I got clean, but relapsed two years ago. It hit me hard but hit my family and friends harder. I found out that when I got high, I got too high. Dangerous levels of high, but when I did it this time it wasn't for high. It was for death to be honest, I wanted to just not feel pain at all and if that meant death then at the time I was okay with that." Katya looked up and sighed. "It is crazy to think that something can send someone too far over the edge that at a moment in time they can forget all their loved ones. But that is what I did, I didn't think about my friends or my mother. It was just me and my pain in my bathroom. My best friend came home and found me, she called 911 and I was rushed to the hospital. I spent a while getting better but even sometimes questioning if I am actually okay. I hated spending so much of my life being a burden that I moved from my home. I couldn't face the hurt that I caused the people I loved, so it was easier to move also. I hate being a problem so here I am, but the fact that I can't move on from that shit is also why I am here. Sitting on the bathroom floor."

"Well, you haven't judged me, even though I stayed with someone abusive asshole. Even though I pushed you away, you helped me when I needed it. I can't say I know how you feel because we all feel different ways but I will say that I will do all I can to help you. To make you feel like you can be open with someone, because I want you to be. I want to be the friend that you are to me." I held Katya's hand and smiled. "Thank you for being here."

"That's what friends are for."

"Well, you're a pretty great fucking friend." I kissed Katya's head as I hugged her.

"I think you are too."

After Katya's shower, we sat on her bed and watched horror movies. She sat with one arm around me and the other on her leg. She traced circles into my leg, sending shivers up and down my spine. "This movie is dumb."

"Katya, I told you it would be."

"Well, I had hope."

"Misplaced hope." Katya pitched my thigh and smiled. "Hey, stop that you bitch."

"Aw, that wasn't nice, you hurt my feelings."

"Oh, I did not. You are such a liar." Katya smiled and kissed my cheek.

"How are you feeling about your appointment later?"

"I dunno, I'm trying to not think about it to be honest."

"I understand, but hey when you are done you can come home and we can talk about it. How does that sound?"

"It sounds amazing, thank you Katya." Katya went back to watching the movie, but I was too busy thinking about what I should say and more about what I shouldn't say.

It had been about a hour and a half, and here I was sitting on the floor trying to find something to wear. It seemed inappropriate to wear something pink, but think again that was most of my clothes. I laid on the floor, covered my face with my hands and groaned. "Ugh, this is fucking pointless."

"Is it really?" I looked behind me and sighed as Katya smiled at me.

"I can't find anything to wear." Katya walked to my closet and laughed.

"You must be crazy, you have so many things to chose from."

"Katya, all my clothes are just I don't know.."

"All of your clothes are you, what are you talking about?" I sat up and stared at Katya. Katya grabbed a pink dress and held it up.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Too pink."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes, yes I am." Katya crossed her arms and leaned against the wall.

"Okay, now about this,  I will pick what you wear while you go take a shower, that way you won't have time to say no to me and waste more time trying to find something. Sound good?"

"Not really, but I've seen that there is no point in telling you no."

"Good, now go take a shower." Katya threw me my towel and pushed my out of my room. I walked to the bathroom and started to undress. Just as I was about to step into the shower, the bathroom door opened. Katya peeked her head inside with a smile. Hey, Trix?" I covered myself with my towel and yelled.

"Katya, what the hell?"

"I was just wondering, do you want me to chose your painties and bra also?" I shook my head and deadpanned at Katya.

"Katya, are you being serious?"

"Of course I am, you have to look good from top to bottom."

"What does my underwear and bra have to do with that?"

"Hmm, you're right. You look good anyway." Katya winked at me then closed the door. I stood in the  middle of the bathroom, staring at the door.

"What in the hell?" I shook my head with a smile on my face and finally stepped into the shower. The hot water felt amazing and helped me to relax. I took a few deep breathes as I washed my hair. Katya had bounced back so fast from her breakdown, it was kinda cool. I was never able to bounce back when I was down. It was always a problem for me, a problem for me to pick myself back up after someone had knocked me down. Katya was different from me though. She cried, let me help, and got over it after. Although truth be told, I was better now than I had been for a while and it was all because of Katya's help. I probably would never have the courage to tell her, but she was such a lifesaver and I wanted to repay her some day. I turned off the shower, got out and walked out of the bathroom back to my room.

"Oh, you're done. Okay, so this is what I picked." Katya pointed to a simple pair of jeans and a pink sweater. "This is cute and simple. Not too much and it looks comfy, so I thought it would be nice." I walked to my bed and sat next to Katya.

"I think it is nice, thank you Katya."

"No problem, but I am going go to my room. You go ahead and get changed." Katya smiled at me and walked to the door. "Oh hey Trixie?"

"Yeah?"

"How about I drive you to the appointment?"

"You'd do that?"

"Of course, then after we could maybe go see a movie then get dinner."

"That sounds nice Katya, thank you." Katya winked at me and walked out of my room to her own. I looked at the jeans and sweater. There was no doubting it, Katya was the sweetest person I had ever met.