Best Friends Brother

Best Friends Brother - Chapter 4, Questions.

I would leave my best friend for him.

Those same words kept repeating in my head - what was I thinking? Wait, no... this was right. Slightly yawning, I had realised I had slept over. Ahmed was knocked out, his face resting on the back of my neck, his arms cradling me. I felt him playing with my hair lightly, letting me know he was there, there for me. If I was going to be honest, I really didn't want to get up, or leave in general - though there was one issue. My best friend was a few doors away, oblivious to everything that was happening.

I eased him off me, and I felt him starting to get restless. His eyes started to open, blinking slowly and looking up at me getting up to leave.

"Hey, where are you going?", he asked lazily, holding onto my hand, pulling me back down by the waist. I rolled my eyes and flopped back down, turning to whisper in his ear:

"I'm leaving, well for now." I replied sweetly, not wanting to disturb his peace. He frowned slightly, and I instantly felt bad.

"Come on. Five more minutes, please?", he begged, his face hard to say no to. I sighed and fell back into his arms, as he started to drift off into a comfortable nap, gripping onto me and not allowing me to leave.

It had been much longer than five minutes, when I turned around, kissed his forehead delicately, and he returned the same on my neck as he finally let me go and I planned to set off. He murmured quietly, half asleep; 

"Call me when you get home, okay?", and I nodded. I reached the door, though couldn't help but turn around and give him one last hug. I melted inside his arms, and he held me tightly. Pulling away, I quickly exited before I had any time to change my mind.

Home:

I shut my bedroom door. I wasn't even completely sure if anything was real anymore. I don't know how things would work, but sooner or later Saidat would find something out. Totally. Though, for some reason... I didn't care. I was so happy with him. He made me feel complete. I pulled out my phone, tapping on his contact: 'Ahmed <3.'

I pressed facetime, and he answered. The same face I had seen staring back at me, telling me how much he missed me and how he wanted to see me again. I felt myself blushing, feeling the same he had felt. We talked for hours, when he hit me with something.

"So, I guess - we're pretty much a thing, right?"

I felt myself smiling gradually.

"You tell me." I replied smugly, challenging him.

"Sofia, I never knew I would've felt this way for you, especially knowing you're best friends with my sister. But to be honest, I don't regret anything. I think about you all the time, I don't know why."

A big, stupid smile was plastered onto my face. I felt so - I'm not sure, to be honest. Out of no where, I heard Ahmed start again.

"You're so pretty, you know that, right?", he said, not helping my situation at all, making my face turn even redder. 

We talked for hours on end, when I heard a sound from the other end. It sounded exactly like Saidat's voice, I would've known as I've spent years with her. She abruptly entered the room, uninvited or welcomed, clearly bearing some sort of news.

"Dinner's ready in fiv-", she stopped, staring at the screen her brother was holding.

"Sofia?", she exclaimed, clearly questioning what was happening.

Ahmed thought fast.

"What are you doing here? You could've knocked first."

Saidat tutted.

"That doesn't concern me right now, what's going on, and why's my best friend's contact name on your phone: 'Sofia <3'?"

We both stayed silent, biting our lips.

"I'm so stupid. I knew something was going on from the day you started acting weird around my friends. Enjoy each others company, and Sofia, don't bother texting me."

Why was I like this? I had to ruin everything good for myself.

Saidat exited the room, clearly annoyed, ignoring both of us altogether. It felt like a piece of my heart had been taken out. An awkward silence occured, though soon enough I told Ahmed I were going to sleep, ending the call all in all.

I buried my face into my pillow, wondering why I had done anything with him, why I couldn't have just held myself back. Why I couldn't have just concealed my feelings. Sighing, I tried to ignore my troubles, and drifted off to sleep.

School:

I stood with Mariam, Samira, Kadija and Ellie. We were talking about...well, I'm not sure to be honest. I had bigger things on my mind. For example, what would happen when Saidat arrived? How would things be? Would we still be talking, and the even huger problem. What would happen with Ahmed and I? 

I was thinking hard, that was when Saidat, Joseph, Ryan and Ahmed had approached us. Everything went silent for a moment. Saidat stared at me, as if she were disgusted. I didn't know what to say, so I kept quiet. Things didn't feel right, everything felt so wrong. Ahmed gave me that same comforting smile, making me feel slightly better, though it wasn't enough during the moment. Before he went to talk to his friends, he whispered to me, giving my hand a quick caress, 'I'll talk to you after school.'

I gave him a quick smile, turning back to the rest of my friends, unsettled from what had just happened.

Afterschool:

Ahmed had acted upon his words, and came to see me after school. He gave me a hug, and I felt like nearly breaking down in his arms. He told me several times it'd be okay, holding me as if I were a baby.

He was such a good listener.

I told him about my day, and how I felt horrible for doing this to Saidat. He looked as if he wanted to say something, though he seemed to shrug it off, so I did the same. Soon enough, he looked me in the eye, asking me if I thought what had happened was a mistake - if we were a mistake.

I stared at him in disbelief.

"Hey, never ask me that again. You know I love being around you." I reassured him gently, as I didn't want him to get the wrong idea. I enjoy his company so much, he made me feel complete. I felt his embrace grow tighter. I felt so secure.

Looking over my shoulder, he declared:

"Let me come over yours."

I looked behind me and smiled, confirming that he had received an invitation. We walked the rest of the way back to my house hand in hand, not caring who saw us or who didn't. All the while I was still thinking about my best friend, and how sorry I felt.

Home:

We sat on the carpeted floors of my bedroom, pillows encircling us, a blanket to share.

I sat up whilst Ahmed rested his head on my shoulder, talking to me about everything and about how it would all be okay. He was trying to be helpful, I know. Everything just felt off. I smiled just so I wouldn't worry him, though soon tears came flooding out in streams. Like a child, I hid my face inside Ahmed's grey, soft hoodie, him helping to calm me down meanwhile. We stayed like this for some time, once in a while taking a break. I thought to myself: what did I do to deserve this, really?

He sat me on his lap, my shoulders facing him, his hands resting on my cheeks, just talking to me and making sure I was okay, making me laugh effortlessly, rubbing his hand up and down my back like I was a puppy.

I was okay, but at the same time I wasn't.

And that was because everything would never be the same again.