The Foreigner

Chapter 16

The morning after Cat's visit, I'm in the bathroom facing the mirror. She is really right. I look horrible. Big sloppy beard, thin, haggard.

I rub the shaving cream on my face. I face the shaver. After several days, he will rediscover my skin.

As I slide the blade, I reflect on the moments I spent with my daughter. I had no idea I would have the courage to say what I told her. To admit that I was wrong. To ask for forgiveness. I feel so good now. So relieved. All the weight of guilt is gone.

I return to my daily routine: having coffee on the porch reading newspaper as I watch Thompson mow the lawn in his garden. But what about Heidi? She hasn't appeared yet. What is she doing? Is she ok? I decide to find out.

I knock on her door. The one who attends to me is a tall young man, hair tied in a ponytail, tattooed arms, flared ears,  chain on pants.

I already know this guy. He's her boyfriend. He looks me up and down like a dog sniffing at another.

-What you want? -The deep voice asks

I hear Heidi's voice behind him, -Who's there? -She approaches. -Hi Mr. Whitman! Can I help you with anything?

-Just wanted to know if you're all right.

-Yes. I am fine. Why? Did something happen? -It is an embarrassing moment and she tries to get around the situation.

-No ... But we never know, don't? If you need anything just call me.

-I'll call you. Thanks. -Her boyfriend looks at me with an unlikely face.

As I walk away from the house, I hear them talking in their language. As always, I don't understand anything.

Back on my porch I read the newspaper watching her house, hoping the guy would leave. A few minutes pass before his car leaves. I wait for the vehicle to disappear, get up, and go head to her house. I ring the bell. She doesn't take long to answer me.

-Hi. I start to talk- I came back because I saw that your boyfriend left and I needed to talk to you.

-Get in. -She opens the door.

-Sorry to have appeared at that time. I hope I have not caused you any problems. - I sit on the couch.

-All right. There was no problem.

She sits down in front ofme. And gives me a penetrating look.

-So what do you want to talk about? Must be a good thing. You look happy.

-Actually, I'm more relieved.

-Tell me what happened. I am curious.

-Me and my daughter finally got along. And it was better than I could expect, although I wasn't expecting it. I managed to apologize to her and she promptly forgave me. She kept no hurt feelings. She even prepared food for me. Can you believe that?

-Good to hear that. --She smiles, but a dissatisfaction is visible on her face.

-Hey, it looks like my news made you sad. What's it?

-No ... I'm happy for you.

-Not. You're not. Something is wrong with you.

-Oh ... -she sighs. -As you spoke, I tried to imagine my father doing the same as you did. Telling me the things you must have said to your daughter. But he would not be able to.

-I understand you. But why don't you try talking to him? Maybe he doesn't want to redeem himself with you? -As I speak she seems to think of the suggestion.

-I think if he wanted to, he would have come to me already.

-Maybe he just needs an opportunity like the one I had.

-I don't know. I think not.

-Oh come on! Try it!

-All right, Mr. Whitman. But I already know what his answer will be. He's busy, he can't pay attention right now, he's in the middle of a meeting ... That's if he answers me -she picks up the notebook. The noisy Skype call rings for a moment until her dad answers. She looks surprised.

They talk in their language. I understand nothing of what they say. Suddenly I hear a female voice from the computer. Heidi gets agitated. It seems that it begins a discussion. She increases the volume of hervoice. Gets angry. Very angry. Until she closes the notebook and lowers her head on it.

I approach and gently lift her face. She has tears in her eyes.

-What happened?

-I should expect that already.

-Expected for what?

-My dad ... He's cheating on my mom.

-What? That's terrible! But are you sure about that?

-I am. He was with another woman in a hotel room

-You may have been mistaken

-No, Mr. Whitman. I know what I saw. They were intimate. She was even wearing his shirt.

-I ... I don't know what to say. I'm sorry for putting you in this situation. 

-I was going to find out sooner or later.

-But I still feel guilty. I kept insisting that you talk to him.

-No, Mr. Whitman. You were not to blame. -She turns to me. -Do you have any commitments, something very important to do today?

-Not. Nothing I can't put off. Why?

-Do you want to spend the rest of the day with me? –I strange the request. But I agree.

-But what about your boyfriend? Not come back?

-No. Do not worry. He won't be back today. And then? Do you stay?

-Stay Yes. Of course I do. -I sit beside her. I hug her sideways, resting her head on my right shoulder. I stroke her hair and my left hand grasps her right hand, lovingly to comfort her.

Now I can understand what she is feeling and why she needs me so much here. She wants to fill the void left by her father, a void similar to what I left in Cat's life. But I didn't go as far as her father did. I did not betray Lorraine.