Have you ever had thoughts about your BBF?
Did you ever want to be adult enough for them to notice you and take you seriously?
Because I do, everyday. But he doesn't care...
When I say "He" I mean the one and only Park Jimin, my BBF.
Will this day...
I don't know what to do. One side of me wants to go and tell Suga everything, but the other side says that there's no point in that, Y/n has a boyfriend anyways...
I'm just frustrated, hurt, angry, upset, sad, and disappointed. I know i was a little bit of a player in my life but it all started after that incident with Suga at y/n's 18th birthday. When i realized y/n is not an option i started to rebel. It angered me that Suga thinks I'm not good for her and from that anger I just kept being this unstable type of guy, who switches girlfriends all the time. A player. That's what everyone think of me for the past 2 years but that's not the truth.
The truth is that i knew what i wanted since i was 20 years old. I knew me and y/n have a great chemistry. I've been always happy around her. I always felt excited near her. I always thought she was beautiful and man, she only became even more beautiful in the past 2 years. I knew what i wanted, i wanted her. But i also knew that i couldn't get her.
After receiving a text from Jungkook to be at the café in an hour i replied saying "fine". Sighing, i got out of bed and decided that i need to stop thinking about this before i'll get deppressed. After taking a shower and relax a little i got ready.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Before going out of the house i told myself that it's enough! Today is going to be a good day. Right?
When arriving to the café, i saw kookie is already sitting at a table so i came and sat down infront of him.
"Hey, finally! What took you so long?" Kookie says while sipping his coffee.
"You ordered already?" I raise an eyebrow, asking him.
"I couldn't wait for you all day long, you know?" He smiled his bunny smile which immediately made me smile also while rolling my eyes murmuring "asshole".
"I heard that" he says.
After ordering my coffee, i turned to kookie who was literally munching on his cookie.
"So, what did you wanna talk about?" I carefully ask him.
"Isn't it obvious Jimin?" He became a little serious and i already know what he's talking about. I look down.
"Yeah...i guess"
"Jimin, it effects you more then you think. You haven't been you lately and all the boys noticed. Including Suga! Don't you think it's better if you'll talk to him? It's been 2 years already, maybe he changed his mind"
"I don't know! I'm afraid kookie. I'm afraid to bring that up again after what happened. Me and Suga are close and i don't want it to break us. But i'm in a point where i only think about her, i want her, i need her" i said trying not to sound so desperate.
"Speaking of the devil" kookie says while gesturing with his head behind me. I then turn around and my heart skipps from what i see. Y/n is here, standing all beautiful at the entrance of the café. She didn't see us 'cause we're sitting at the corner.
"Maybe it's luck, don't you think?" Kookie whispers at me, trying to get my attention.
While still thinking about it, and still looking at her. My brain stopped working. Tears. That's what i feel. Tears are stuck deep in my throat. I am trying so hard not to let it show but i know i'm not doing that much good of a job.
She's not alone. She's with him. For a moment all of the hope i had in Jungkook's words just faded away. Seeing them here, standing infront of me, made me realize exactly the opposite.
"More like a bad luck" i turn my gaze back to kookie. Kookie, with wide eyes after looking at the couple infront of him, is now looking at me.
"J-Jimin...I-I'm sorry i didn't-"
"It's fine" i gaze back at the couple that are now sitting at a table, laughing and chatting, "you can have my order, i'm out" i throw him the money and get up from my sit.
"What? Wait!" He starts but i'm just heading out of the café, not looking at anything, or anyone, just looking for the quickest way to get the hell out of here.
When I arrived at my apartment, I slammed the door behind me. There, when I was completely alone, I began to cry. But to really cry, all the frustration, the pain, the hurt, the helplessness. I didn't know what am i supposed to do! I can't talk to Suga and I can't stand seeing her with anyone else! I'm just stuck in this situation and it's killing me!
Heavy breathing with face all wet from crying, and sitting on the floor while my back is leaning on the wall, I'm beginning to wonder maybe it would be good for her without me. Maybe she doesn't need me. She didn't seem to be suffering with him at the café, she seemed happy. Maybe it's better for her to have him and not me. But am i selfish for wanting it to be me?
My phone rings again but i just take it and throw it away from me, to the other side of the living room. I don't have power or will to talk to anyone right now. I think i'm starting to understand that that's it! I've lost! Even the little hope that i had died when i saw them together. That's when it became real. She actually has a boyfriend.
As i feel sorry for myself and at the same time laughing because of how pathetic i am, someone knocks on my door. This person is definetly not patient, the knocks are getting stronger and quicker each seconed and i'm afraid he'll break the door. Groaning in annoyance i get up and head towards the door and open it.
"WHAT?" I yell as i open the door and to my surprise, it's Jungkook all sweating, trying to catch his breath.
"What are you doing here?" I roll my eyes and turn around, trying to wipe my tears away with my sleeve. I don't need him to start pitty me or something.
"W-Why...a-arn't you...a-answering...your god damn phone?" He raises his voice, taking a breath between the words.
"Well, i'm sorry i was busy understanding how fucked up my life is!" I galre at him, "Now what do you want?"
"Ok, you won't belive this" his eyes flushed with excitment all of a sudden.
"Just say it already! I'm not in the mood!"
"She's not really with that Eric guy, Jimin! Y/n is single!" He says with a big smile on his face.
My heart stopped beating. I don't think i realize what he is saying, maybe i'm hearing things now 'cause this can't be real.
"W-What?"
******
So that's it for pt.12 of this story...
How do you guys think Jungkook knows the truth? And how do you think Jimin will react?
Please leave your thoughts on the comments! 😊
Thank you for reading this book, it really means a lot to me even though i know i'm not doing a good job at uploading very often. Well, sorry for that 🙁
