B r o k e n S k a t e r ~ reddie

[ chapter four ]

Warnings
- self harm
- abuse
- swearing
- homophobic slurs

Eddie went to bed after the incident.. it was saturday so he didn't had to go to school, he wanted to sleep but the thoughts kept him awake..

- does he hate me?
- what if i'm coming out to him
- i'm gross
- boys suck
- why i'm gay
- how would he react if I kiss him
- no.. don't think about that Eds, gross
- did I just call myself Eds?
- Eddie its just a phase

Tears rolled down Eddies cheeks at that moment.. he looked at his phone to listen to "Girls just wanna have fun" and "I wanna dance with somebody"
And tried to sleep after that, at 1:00 am

•

Richie was in his room.. looking in the mirror, he was sad.. he looked at his bruises and said

"This is what you deserve for being such a faggot"

He looked in the mirror

"Henry was right.. I deserved more"

He looked at his desk and grabbed some scissors

He looked in the mirror, deeply, staring in his own eyes

"This is what you deserve Rich" he whispered and started putting the cold scissors at his warm soft skin from his arm

He squeezed his eyes shut and moved the hard cold scissors over his skin

He opent his eyes and saw a line.. with nothing.. he stared at it, watching how slowly the blood came out of the line, a tear escaped his eye, the pain made him shiver at first but when he got used to it and the line stopped bleeding, he made more

He felt okay, he felt like he got what he deserved, and went to bed, at 1:00 am

•

Eddie woke up and felt like he didn't sleep at all, he was tired and sad, he went out to skate

When he left his mom said something like "where are you going?" But he didn't care again, she didn't give him any food this weekend, and if he asks why, she says its because he doesn't listen.. his aunt lives 5 minutes away from their house so he eats his lunch by her if hes really hungry

He went out, to the bench where he met Richie, he sat down and tried to not think about the boy the whole time so he listened to some music, and closed his eyes

"Hey"

He jumped a little from the sound

"Holy- you scared me" he said to the black haired boy

"I don't bite Eds" Richie winked

"Don't call me that"

"So.. you wanna hang out or something?" Richie said

"Right now?" Eddie noticed he blushed

"Yeah right now" Richie said, less confident

"I'm sorry, I have to go" Eddie said, remembering how Richie would think about him

"But-"

Eddie was already gone

"Fuck" Richie said.. "he knows Henry was right"

•

Eddie was home again and went upstairs, He got a message from Richie.. Eddie answered

Richie: hey Eds

Eddie: don't call me that

Richie: are you mad at me?

Eddie: mad? Me? Never