Somewhere in Neverland ➳ Connor McDonough/ Before You Exit Fanfic

Twelve

Julia's POV

        After I lost Connor in the weird world that we had entered, I gave up looking and just sat down on some random tree branch.

I just thought.

Mostly about what I had been feeling lately about Connor. I really do like him but I had already known that he isn't capable of feeling how I feel. Or at least I don't think so.

Also, there's this thing nipping at me and it's making me feel uncomfortable and anxious. I feel like there's something I should really know but can't quite remember.

"Hi", a voice said and my heart immediately started racing as butterflies erupted in my stomach.

I looked to my left and Connor was there, staring at me. His bright blue eyes shining in the moonlight.

"Hey", I replied as I looked down at my hands. "Where did you go? I looked for you literally everywhere."

"Nowhere important."

"It's important to me", I said, biting my lip and trying not to say anything that I'll regret.

"But why?"

"Because I really care about you Connor... I care about you a lot", I finally said. Quickly yet surely.

I pushed myself off of the tree branch and started flying away from the boy that I had come to love.

And I didn't know if I was hearing things but the wind seemed to whisper to me in the voice of Connor.

"I care about you too... I care about you a lot."

~~~~~~~~

I arrived back in Neverland just as the sun began to rise.

It was lonely.

Without Connor this magical place was dull. No color. No life. Nothing.

I decided to skip the tree house and go to the cave that I had found while we were playing hide and seek a few days ago.

I grabbed an oil lamp that was just laying around somewhere and flew into the darkness. My only guide being the dim flicker of the flame that barely even reached a foot in front of me.

The sound of the waves crashing into the rocks from outside was barely even audible anymore as I walked further in.

"Julia? Julia I know you're in here", I suddenly heard someone say from a few feet away and there was no doubt it was Connor. Who else would it be?

I stayed quiet and just waited until he caught up with me. Which didn't take very long at all.

"There you are", he sighed in relief that he had finally found me.

"Here I am."

"That thing that you said a while ago about caring about me... Was that true? Do you really care that much?"

"Yes, Connor. I care about you a lot."

"Well, I really care about you too", he said as removed his hat and started fumbling with it.

"You do?"

"Yeah."

"How much do you care about me?", I asked, getting anxious.

Within the period of time that we've been together I have fallen pretty fast but I'm too scared to call it love, because the scariest thing ever is knowing that he won't love me back.

"... A lot", he replied, sheepishly.

My heartbeat was fast and my hands went clammy.

"Do you like me?"

He started blinking rapidly and a light tint of pink on his cheeks was visible in the dim lighting.

"Y-y-yeah.... I think so... I like you... Do you like me too?"

I smiled at what had just escaped his mouth.

"Of course I do, Connor."

I felt like I was floating. Well, I most probably was but I didn't bother checking if my feet were on the ground or not.

His lips curled up into a magnificent smile and I found myself falling in love even harder.

I would be committing suicide by asking him this next question but I just really needed to know. I didn't really care about what happened after because for some reason my heart knew his answer.

"Do you...... love me?", I asked, holding my breath and his smile disappeared this time replaced with a look of pure fear.

"I wasn't meant to love", was his simple reply. What did that even mean?

"What do you mean you weren't meant to love? Everybody needs love."

"Well, I don't and I never will!", I could hear doubt in his voice.

"Well, you're wrong! You're a dirty liar! Because let me tell you this Connor..... I love you... and you need my love!"

"I already told you that I don't need anyone's love!"

"Oh.... but you want my love just as much as I want yours. So why won't you admit it!?!"

"Because I'm just a little boy who doesn't know about the world beyond this world and how cruel or happy it is there", he yelled before flying out of the cave as I chased after him.

"You aren't a little boy Connor! You might think you are but you aren't!"

"Shut up!"

"I won't stop until you admit that you love me the way that I have come to love you because I know how you feel towards me but you're too scared to say it to my face and I don't see why."

But he didn't reply.

We were back in the weird place that we were in just a few hours before. What was so special about this place? Why did he keep coming here? And why did I always follow him?

"Connor! Can you at least tell me where we are!", I yelled as the wind whipped my hair around he shook his head and turned back with a look of fear and worry.

"If I tell you you'll remember."

"Remember what? Why won't you tell me?"

"Because then you'll leave me and I can't let that happen."

"I'll never leave you Connor."

He stopped flying and turned around so that we were face-to-face. There were tears in his eyes and he just looked so broken.

I wiped a tear as it slid down his face and he flinched at my touch as I withdrew my arm.

"What's wrong?", I asked, feeling guilty. Maybe, I had gone too hard on him. 

"I just can't picture Neverland to be the same without you."

"Without? Connor, I'm not going anywhere."

"Are you sure about that?", he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Turn around", he said, softly.

I did as I was told and in a split second everything came flooding back.

~~~~~~~~

A/N: What do you think Julia saw? Btw I'm gonna ditch school and go on vacation for about 3 days bc i'm a rebel.... nah... but seriously i'm not sure if i'll have wifi there so i wanted to make a pretty long chapter just in case there isn't wifi there. Also, I didn't bother to edit this so sorry for any errors ♥ Via