He stood there, biting his lip, he never even gave me eye contact.
What a rude prick.
But in saying that, I was the one giving the ultimatum.
He slowly stood to his feet, his lips were as dry as a desert. His head still hung down, almost scared to look me in the eye. But that wasn't the case, he was disappointed in me, and to be honest, I was highly disppointed in myself. I was disppointed that I had fallen in love with someone who tried a million times to try get me to stop painting pieces of art on my body but yet when I'm not around he does a hypocriticial, dick move and does the exact thing I did.
we draw on our bodies to control pain.
we do it to be perfect.
we do it to be accepted, nothing less and nothing more.
Tears bubbled in his eyes.
"Lelia, you used me to get what you want?" he stopped for a moment, controling the shaking in his voice.
"you used me to find my scars that are plotted all over my body, and you never even considered that the only reason why I didn't show them to you, was for you.
I tilted my head like a scolded puppy. If I had a tail it would be tucked between my legs.
he saw my confusion and continued explaining, he was treating me as if I were dumb.
"I-I never showed you because I felt like if I showed you, you would do them to yourself even more. And if you didn't it would be a hell of a lot harder because it's triggering. You see, I know you. I know that your favorite color is purple, and that you can't stand normal tasting coffee because you feel like it's boring-just like you, but that's not the case, you aren't boring, life is boring, I'm boring, and so is everything else in this world, well except you, because you're perfection, far from boring, I knew if I showed you what I did behind closed doors that I'd never get your trust back" He trailed off, finally making eye contact with me.
"Ashton?" I whisper.
"mhhm?" he licks his lips, anxious.
"You don't have to if you don't want to but please, remove all your bracelets, let me see what's under them, let me see what pain you went through and let me be there because I obviously wasn't there when you needed me the most"
He started chewing his bottom lip, again.
But slowly one by one I could see his arm.
And what I saw terrified me, but also made me love him more then I could ever have imagined.
HI GUYS WOW OKAY SO THIS IS A DOUBLE UPDATE BC IM ON A COMPUTER HOLLAAAA.
remember, y'all are perfection. if you are ever sad, remember that I love you sososo much.
Stay perfect? -Hayley.
