Tutor (Lab Rats Fanfiction)

Chapter 12 Social Suicide

Disclaimer: I do not own Lab Rats.

Avalon's P.O.V.

"Well, what is it?" Chase asked. It was obvious he was getting annoyed, and his impatient attitude bugged me. However, that irritation quickly vanished as nervousness crept up on me.

You're gonna blow your secret, and he's going to tell everyone. This is social suicide. Just walk away like nothing happened. It's not like he's gonna care, anyway. He's just your tutor. It's not too late to back out.

No. I pushed all of those thoughts away. I needed to do this. Otherwise, this pattern will keep repeating itself. Fail a class, Chase questions me, I avoid him. It will never end. Unless I just tell him.

"I realy did understand the material," I muttered to him, already beginning to regret my words.

"Well, then why did you fail? Did you not put in any effort?" he inquired, trying to pry the answers out of me.

"No, Chase! That's what I've been trying to tell you! I'm doing my best! I put all of my effort into everything! It's just all too hard for me!" I explained, trying to convince him while avoiding exposing my secret. Too bad I couldn't help my voice, which was steadily increasing in volume and pitch.

"Avalon, I'm sorry, but if you know the facts, and purposely fail a quiz, that is not effort," he quipped while crossing his arms over his plaid shirt.

Ugh! He's not hearing me right!

"Listen to me!" I shouted, hoping this would lead to the end of the conversation. It's been dragging on far too long (even if it just started), and I need to get to math before Mr. Brian throws a fit. "I didn't purposely fail that quiz! I couldn't read the stupid questions!"

This just seemed to confuse Chase even more. He threw his head back and pinched the bridge of his nose out of frustration.

"Then order new glasses, Avalon. Your eyesight cannot be so bad that you can't read the paper in front of you."

Are you kidding me? He still doesn't get it? I thought the teachers said he was smart!

"No! I don't need glasses, you idiot! I have dyslexia!" As soon as I said those last three words, my hand flew up to my mouth to stop my shouting. But it was too late. Chase heard me. I was so loud, he actually flinched a little at my volume.

If I was really that loud, then that means...

I glanced around me, taking in my surrounding. Yes, I was still in the hallway. Yes, the bell had already rung.
Yes, all of the students ignored to bell to stay in the hall and watch the show that was being displayed for them. Everyone knew.

Some students had their hands covering their jaws, trying to hide their gaping mouths- or more like their snickering grins. Several of the students didn't even bother to hide their surprise. And of course, there was the sympathetic gazes. These were the worst by far.

You'd think sympathy would be a good thing. The horrid truth is that sympathy is just as bad as bullying. The 'Oh, I'm so sorry. That must make everything hard for you' was heard far too many times. No one really meant what they said. They didn't understand what it was like. It bothered me how many people compared my problems to theirs.

They all thought my dyslexia made me weak. They didn't know what my family said to me -what I said to myself- to feel better. Having a burden to carry doesn't make you weak. It makes you stronger for being able to handle it. My burden was dyslexia.

From how often I used to hear this, you'd think I would believe it. But I don't. Every rude comment -every nasty remark- shredded even the tiniest bit of confidence that my maxim supplied me with. So, in a way, they were right. I'm a weak, pathetic girl who can't read or write without struggling. I'll never accomplish anything, and il never be happy. My dyslexia doomed me.

Back in reality, I was still recovering from all of the students' expressions. I guess the most shocking part of this whole thing was Chase's reaction. His eyes bugged a little in surprise and he shifted his backpack, feeling uncomfortable and awkward in this situation. He had, after all, been the reason for me to start screaming. His face was dominated by a light pink tint. His mouth was opening and closing, trying to figure out what he should say.

"I'm sorry, Avalon. I-"

There it is again. I don't want or need sympathy from anyone. Especially when that person has no idea how I actually feel. No smart kid could ever contemplate my struggles.

"Chase, don't. I don't want to hear how sorry you feel for me. I've heard it all before, and I'm sick of it. Just..." I trailed off, not wanting to sound mean. However there was no way around it. He pushed me too far and I caved. "leave me alone for a little bit," I finished turning on my heal to walk down the hall. Well, tried.

I knew there were a lot of students in the hall, but what I didn't know was how many of them there were. Twenty? Thirty? More, maybe? It all confused me. Everything seemed meshed together- every color blended together in unrecognizable blobs. My mind was playing tricks on me. All of the people seemed to be getting closer, crowding around me to the point of mental suffocation. I thought I heard a teacher screaming at a few students, but I couldn't tell for sure due to my ears feeling like they were stuffed with cotton. I needed to get out of there.

I pushed my way through the mob of students, trying to reach the safety that was outside. Very few actually moved out of my way, mostly students I had already classified as geeks. They acted as if dyslexia was as contagious as the flu. I hated it.

"Avalon, stop! Please! Let me talk to you for a second!" A voice called from behind me. I completely ignored it and continued to maneuver myself through the students. Chase was just going to try to apologize again, and it's the last thing I needed at that point.

I continued to trek through the mass of students. I heard another voice, but I didn't stop for her.

"Avalon, come back! Let me talk to you!" she called. I just kept pushing myself through the everyone. Even Bree couldn't help me at this point. She'd been a great friend, but now that she knows I've been keeping a secret, she'll just leave me behind like everyone else will. Well, everyone who hasn't already.

I needed freedom. From everything. Students. Teachers. Tests and quizes. All of it. When I finally got to the blue doors of the school, only one person stood in my way.

"Ava, what's this all about? What is dyslexia?" Trent asked. He sounded even more confused than I had ever been, which was quite an achievement

This sent my brain on overload. I simply couldn't handle Trent at the moment. I had just gone through a trauma, and a clueless boyfriend was not on my list of necessities.

"Trent, not now. I need to go," I reasoned with him, sidestepping said boy to push open the door.

"Ava, stop," he demanded, grabbing my wrist and pulling me back to face him. "you need to listen to me."

His sudden commands caught me off gaurd. His face was hard and tense, dare I say focused. His hand was tight around my wrist. I could feel my heartbeat in my fingers.

What's that called? Throbbing? Ugh, this is so frustrating!

"My name is not Ava, and I need to leave now. Bye, Trent," I hissed, ripping my arm away from his clutch. Gymnastics isn't only good for balance. Strength is one of my few... well, strengths.

"Come back here!" Trent scolded after I ran out of the school and across the pavement. I ignored him (like I've done to many people that day), and kept running to a place where I'd be able to calm myself down.

AN: So, the secrets out! Where do you think Avalon ran off to? What will everyone's reactions be when she gets back? What will she do next? All great questions I would love an answer to!

QOTD: Do you think Sabrina or Jake is part of Krane's bionic army?

Until next time...

PEACE OUT PICKLES!!!