where wings can fall

MATT

Kasie  and I grew up together but she was just to stubborn to notice i existed , sometimes she'd walk right past me for weeks on end , pretending to be living alone . that's  who kasie was , she'd always say

" you think you were always meant to save me ? that path was never meant for you,"

the night i caught our dad on top of her replays in my head on a loop , i just stood there and watched as her body went still and limp and she stopped fighting , she stopped fighting to get out of his grip , she stopped fighting to live , and from that moment onwards kasie was never the same.

she was never willing to call it what it  was ,the idea of rape itself remained so terrifyingly pervasive to her.

               ~~~~~~~~~~

Lesley and I have been trying to get a hold  of jane but now that she's  17 there's not much left for us to do . Jane reminds me alot of kasie , the way her nose crunches when she's angry or when her eyes are all puffy when she wakes up in the morning.

i gave jane the box , the box that kasie left behind , the only thing that is left of kasie.

"yes , yes that way,"  Lesley says to someone as she locks the doors behind her.

"matt, wes is here!!" she shouts a little too loudly.

wes?  my mind races to the thought of why he could be here , let alone sobbing his heart out on my bathroom floor. I rush down the staircase and my pulse begins to rise as i wait for him impatienly to come out .

Lesley explains that he has something to say to me of great importance.
" Kasie's dead isn't she?" i scream at the top of my lungs.

" no no , calm down matt , its good news ," Lesly comforts me as she cradles me in her arms , i relax at the touch of her hands on my shoulders. Wes finally comes out and takes a seat on the red couch across the dining room.

" a guy phoned me last night matt, they found her , well not technically, they stopped her with a man and a teenage girl yesterday at stud cafe," he says sniffling his way through his words.

my throat  dries up , no words come out , i've been waiting for this moment for 17 years and now i have nothing to say. i stare blankly at the wall , a picture of Kasie and i still hangs on the wall, we were so happy back then or atleast i thought we were .

what man ? so Kasie has been gone for 17 years and reappears with a man . oh what a coincidence. wes's phone rings and for a moment my heart skips a beat , is it her?

Wes answers the phone , his face turns white as he drops down the floor , gesturing for me to take his phone as he falls unconscious, i take the phone , terrified of what's about to face me . Lesley is shivering while helping Wes regain his conscience.

"Hello," i stutter

"Matt it's me , it's kasie , i'm coming home," she sobs hysterically .

" meet me in a few , you know where to find me , old man."  she lets out a tiny giggle

i hang up , tears streaming down my face as i tell Lesley what just happened.

old man is what Kasie used to call me when i'd get protective of her , we were kids back then , life was simple .

we wake Wes up and all three of us get into the car , just like old times .

for a moment there i felt 18 again , going to the game with Lesley and Wes in the backseat. nostalgia courses through my veins as i speed up to get to Kasie faster .