I was laying on the cold wood floor not breathing ,just staring into the solid black closet. I wasn't breathing because I didn't want to. I wanted to die. My boy friend had asked me to go with him to New Jersey. I couldn't leave my mother alone. She was sick. Very sick. She needed me to take care of her so I decided to stay. My boyfriend Charles left. I was devastated. Unfortunately two hours later my mother died. She whispered my name twice before her eyes rolled back into her head.
I definitely wanted to die. The room I was laying in was my mothers room. Why I decided to die there I have no idea. Her bed was small just big enough for her small fragile body. Her and Charles were the only people I ever loved. Even though mother and Charles were insane they still took up huge areas in my heart. They kept me sane. And now that they where gone...
I wanted to die.
Suddenly my best friend Mikayla burst into the room she looked worried. She probably already new I was trying to kill myself. She picked me up off the floor tears rolling down her cheeks. I was also crying. She wiped the tears off my cheeks and laid me down on my mothers small bed.
Last night she had wanted to stay over at my house but she had a doctors appointment. She didn't want me to hurt myself. She was smart to think I would. Mikayla turned on the bath and help me undress myself . She reminded me of my mother before she went insane...
I stepped into the bath and sank down into the thick layer of bubbles. They felt warm on my cold dead skin. She sadly looked at me and said "You can forget about Charles he didn't want to stay with you and that's that. And you knew your mother was old and sick. She was miserable." Mikayla looked at my toes protruding out of the water and then back at me "You can't be serious. Really? Killing yourself over Charles? Think about how I would feel if you left this world? I would feel the same way you felt. UNHAPPY! Suicidal..."
I looked her in the eye "Sorry..."
Mikayla sighed and left the room.
