his last christmas | sad kagehina fanfiction.

We need to talk.

Kageyama was asleep. He was covered in blanket after blanket as the thick covers made him feel adequately warm in the winter. 

Although, that comfortableness didn't last long. Kageyama's phone screen illuminated. He was such a light sleeper that it woke him immediately.

Kageyama, still half asleep, groggily reached for his phone.

It was a little bit past 12 in the morning, he'd gotten a text message.

It was from Hinata.

"What on earth is he up to at this point of night?" Kageyama sought to himself, opening the notification grumpily.

Hey, we need to talk. There's something I need to tell you. Come over to my place, I can't leave Natsu alone. Urgent.

Kageyama was somewhat pissed off. First, he texts him in the middle of the night, and now he needs to go over to Hinata's place to speak with him. Unfortunately, that was not the only emotion he was sensing. He felt sick and nervous. Kageyama usually referred to the words 'we need to talk' to either something bad or something along the lines of a breakup.

Feeling these things, Kageyama had an urge to see Hinata right this instant.

It was even colder at night than during the late afternoon. Thankfully, Hinata's house was only a few minutes' walk down the street. Kageyama visited him regularly on weekends and after school. 

After a few moments, Kageyama had arrived at Hinata's doorstep.

He figured Natsu was asleep, so instead of ringing the doorbell he quietly opened the door and entered.

He looked around for a moment until he noticed Hinata sitting on the couch, wrapped in blankets with a cup of hot cocoa. This seemed typical of him, drinking sugary drinks in the middle of the night. No wonder he's always so excited and energetic.

Kageyama made his way over to him whilst waving warmly.

"Good morning, Hinata," Kageyama spoke in a sarcastic manner, smiling.

"Yes, good morning to you too!" Hinata giggled. "Come sit down, I made you some cocoa."

Kageyama took his shoes off, placed them in the doorway and made his way over to the lounge room. He took a seat on a mat in front of the coffee table, facing Hinata.

"There's something genuinely important about me you should know." Hinata began.

Kageyama was relieved that this conversation wouldn't be about their relationship, but he was quite anxious because of Hinata's dull tone in voice.

"I hope you don't think of me differently," Hinata continued. "This is taking me a lot of courage to say this, however..."

He paused.

He was fiddling around a bit beneath the covers, making Kageyama a slight bit nervous. It wasn't until Hinata hoisted his arms out of the blanket, Kageyama's thoughts froze.

His heart sunk. What he saw was nothing like presumed, it was worse. He was nowhere near immune to this feeling, as every consideration sent shivers down his spine.

The sight of Hinata's bared left wrist and bloody bandages on the right made him feel weak. Everything made sense now. The long sleeve shirts, how clingy Hinata had been lately, even the secret Santa.

Hinata started weeping. "Do you still love me?" He whimpered hopelessly.

Kageyama felt pathetic. Pathetic for being so oblivious to Hinata's situation and living life ordinarily. He felt pathetic for making stupid jokes around Hinata, despite how much he was hurting.

He broke down crying and wailing. "Of course I still love you, Hinata!" He rose up slowly, legs quivering.

Kageyama made his way over to the spot beside to Hinata and got under the covers next to him.

"How long?" Kageyama pleaded, "How long have you been doing this?"

Kageyama pulled him in for a hug, burying Hinata's face into his chest.

"About two months, Kageyama."

The house was warm, yet Kageyama's legs were scattered with goosebumps. He kissed Hinata on the forehead.

"I'm always here for you. If you ever need someone to embrace you, please, please call me. I'll come over as soon as possible." He clasped Hinata tighter. "Please, I'll do anything to make you stop. It aches me to see you in this state."

Kageyama's shirt was damp with tears, but that didn't trouble him. What signified to him most was Hinata. He pulled the hug in closer and held onto Hinata tighter than ever before.

His body was heated and snug, it made Kageyama feel comfortable and safe. He cherished being in Hinata's presence.

He was close to drifting off to sleep with Hinata in his arms.

"I'm going to die before Christmas," Hinata whispered.

"I'm going to kill myself."

And as quick as lightning, that sleepy feeling went away.