𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐎𝐋

chapter three

millie's pov:

it was dark out, specifically eleven fifty-two pm. i was getting ready to go to the apartment that finn was staying in. we needed to talk, and i didn't care about his stupid girlfriend that was obviously there with him. i tied up the laces of my converse and started to walk.

the apartment that he was staying in wasn't far away from my house at all. it was around two streets away, as iris had told me. everybody else was still at my house, but i needed to go. even sarah had forgiven finn, which just showed that he deserved everybody's forgiveness. we all assumed the worst and didn't think about what finn could of been going through, or is going through.

i entered the apartment complex and looked at my hand where iris had written the number of their apartment. twenty-three. i quickly ran up the two flights of stairs, and walked slowly up the corridor until i found the number. i knocked softly.

finn answered around two minutes later. "y-you can't be here. what are you doing here?"

"i just came to say that i forgive you." i said, remembering that i couldn't tell him what iris told me. i'd be breaking a promise if i did.

he let out a little sigh before stepping out and closing the door quietly. he pressed his back up against the white wall, and his hair was a little messy. he was wearing black sweatpants with a white jumper and white socks. he didn't look like he was on drugs, he looked sober.

"thank god." he said, "but is late, belle."

my heart leapt as i heard the nickname for the first time in five years. it brought back memories that i forgot existed. yet all of the memories i forgotten, i would never forget the first day he called me that. and the fact that i had liked him for years, and he fell in love with me.

"is dangerous for you to be out." said the french boy, looking straight at me.

"i know. maybe we can meet at an earlier time, another day. like whilst you're here." i said, to see what he would reply.

he looked to the ground, "okay, i will look."

"anyways, i heard you have a girlfriend. how is she treating you?" i asked, acting like i knew nothing.

"great. how about you? any lover?" he asked.

"nope, not yet." i replied, "and you have a child!"

"ah, yes. my éledie. i think you will like her, she cute. she doesn't talk in english, though. only french." he told me.

"luckily i learnt to speak french in college." i smiled.

"you did?" he asked, his eyes widening with a smile.

"yeah, i thought it seemed interesting." i said.

he smiled widely, "i miss you, belle. is great talking, but i have to go. speak soon."

"okay, bye finn." i said.

"bye." he replied, walking into the apartment.

finn's pov:

i walked back into the apartment after speaking to millie. speaking to her made me extremely happy, in a way that i hadn't felt in years. the only things that made me happy in the years without millie were éledie's first word, and how it was papa instead of mama.

dylan made me pretty happy, he was funny. and paige, she was very supportive. whereas alice, not so much. iris was the brutally honest friend that everybody needed, and if i was doing something wrong, she would instantly let me know instead of letting me continue. i appreciated her for that. she was the only girl that alice actually didn't have a problem with, due to her not liking guys. she claimed that she liked paige, but it didn't really seem like it.

iris, dylan, and paige didn't like alice. i didn't either, but i had no choice other than to act like i did, for my own sake, and for éledie's sake. it made me sad that éledie didn't have the perfect life that she deserved. sure, she got every single thing that she asked for, because i felt guilty if i didn't get her it. but she didn't have parents that loved each other, and i knew that feeling to well.

"à qui parlais-tu?" i heard the voice of alice. (who were you talking to?)

"quelqu'un a appelé pour demander son chemin." i lied, "Je n'avais pas le choix de parler français, je suis désolé." (someone called, asking for directions. i had no choice to not speak french, i'm sorry.)

she didn't say anything after that. she just walked closer to me, and i felt a sting on the side of my face. it wasn't a new feeling. i was used to it. she pushed me backwards, and i didn't say anything to defend myself, like a fool. she just took my hand and walked into the bedroom with me.

we both got in the bed, and she turned off the light. she snuggled up to me, like nothing happened. i couldn't sleep, though. i stared up at the roof, with my mind taking me places that they had been before. the ending of my life, my own suicide, my own death. all of it. it's all i had contemplated recently.

i couldn't escape alice's trap, and all i could possibly do to stop it was the selfish way out, as other people would call it. i couldn't think of anybody that would actually dwell on my death, except a few hardcore fans that i didn't know personally. my daughter would grow up to only vividly remember me, so it wouldn't really concern her. alice would be happy that i was out of the picture with no other girls.

and well, millie. i hoped that she would care about my death, but something within me was telling me that she wouldn't. i didn't speak to my mom an awful lot, she basically disowned me when i started with the drugs.

it was set in my mind, and i didn't think nothing could change that. i didn't want to live, and tomorrow would be my last day.