It wasn't always like this

It wasn't always like this. I can still remember the time when it wasn't. Perhaps it started when mum lost her job years ago, and found the delights a bottle could offer, or when dad fell sick the last time, or the time before that. I never could pin-point when it began, I guess it got rotten with age.

Dad was too ill to work. He was too ill to do anything, and mum's new "job" only just brought in enough for the bills. Not many people pay for a dance from an old bat like her with her attitude. And even if she did earn more, it would straight away be spent on her bubbly dreamland. She always came home late, smashed, and angry. If I was lucky she would straight away pass out, but most nights she'd pick a fight about anything. Her favourite was that I was old enough to be working and should be contributing to the income, but if I worked no one would look after dad and the house. She despised my father. She hated the medical costs, the special meals he needed, and all the doctor's appointments where she had to sober up and make an appearance. She acted like he wasn't even there. Sometimes I can still remember the walks to the playground we'd take as a family, before dad got ill and was condemned indoors. I remember how happy, and in love they were. Life was beautiful then.

A crash from downstairs interrupted my thoughts and I glanced at the clock. 11:37pm; that would be mum home. I walked downstairs to find her passed out on the kitchen floor, a smashed beer bottle and vase next to her. Great, another mess for her to blame on me. I walked to the lounge-room to check if dad had woken, which he hadn't, then I got to work cleaning. She soon woke up when I got the vacuum cleaner out, and she was furious. I braced myself.

"What do you think you're doing?!" she screamed in my face.

"You knocked a vase, I'm just clean-"

"You know not to wake me!"

"B-But you were on the floor, I thought I'd just-" I was cut off by a slap to the face.

"Don't you talk back at me" she mumbled.

Sure, it wasn't the first time she'd struck me. But every time after the initial blow it stung even more; she was reassuring me it was no accident.

She remained unfazed in her drunken haze and went to the fridge for another beer. I finished cleaning up while biting back tears and went to see dad. He always knew what to say. I sat next to him on the stool, he looked wearily at me.

"She yelling at you again?" he breathed out.

I nodded, "like always"

"You should leave...shouldn't have to deal with her crap", he coughed.

"But I can't leave you", I whispered.

He smiled lightly, "trust me...you can. Fetch me a glass of water, will you?"

In the kitchen mum was sitting at the bench, staring at the bottle in front of her. "Who are you even talking to?" she asked, uninterested.

I ignored her and went back to dad. I froze, and the glass I was holding smashed to the floor. He was gone, as if he were never there. The world was spinning, whispers crept in from the walls and they were all screaming the same thing. Run. I dashed upstairs, got my stash of money from under the loose floorboard, and then I bolted.

I ran for what seemed like hours. I must have gone at least a dozen blocks before I stopped to rest on a bench. I looked up at the street lamp towering above me. It was flickering violently, almost like a fatalistic warning, like it was questioning my choice. I was too.

I walked to the nearest bus stop and got on, not caring where I went. The further the better. Sinking down in the seat, I began to think everything over, but I was so incredibly tired. Now that the weight of my parents was off my shoulders I could rest. Tomorrow, a new day would begin. I'd think everything over, and eventually, tonight would just be a memory.
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I was woken the next morning by the bus driver shooing me off the bus. I rushed off and stepped out into the middle of the city. What city? I had no idea. I took a deep breath, and my exhale felt like the weight of the world was lifted from my shoulders.

Scanning the streets, I saw a man dancing with a sign, I focused on what it said and genuinely laughed. It read "a new day has begun".

Oh, you have no idea.