Depresso and Espresso

Introduction !

Espresso: *walks in* HELLO EVERYBODYYYYYY ! CAN I GET A WOOWOO ?

Depresso: spresso-

E: COME ON! SAY IT WITH ME!! WOOOO

D: Spre-

E: I CANT HEAR YOUUU-

D: ESPRESSO.

E: *stops* what?

D: the cameras aren't even on yet and the audience is still getting seated

E: ...yeah but look at her! she seems happy to be here!

*Some random girl screams*

D: Spresso... she has a condition

E: :0

D: ...

E: ohmygod...

*Director comes on stage*

Director: last minute make up, kids! *powders espresso in powder*

E: ouUuuuu powder haha can I sniff it

D: Spresso no.

E: ...

D: ...

E: ...

D: I mean unless you share-

Camera man: alright! Places everyone! Depresso! Espresso! Sit down, will you? We're about to introduce the show!

E: DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO-

D: espresso, calm it.

E: *growls*

D: did you just fucking growl

E: maybe.

D: you fucking crackhead

Camera man: 5... 4... 3... 2...

E: HOLA AMIGOS!

D: Hey guys

E: So like... welcome to our new hit series! Depresso and Espresso!

*crowd cheers*

D: yeah yeah whatever. so for our first episode I guess we'll just introduce-

E: SO BASICALLY

D: *fucking groans*

E: on this NEW HIT, we will be keeping y'all updated on our personal and dramatic lives! we can start off with mini stories like how we met and how we became close, BUT we'll mostly spill tea in our lives! But of course we'll occasionally add in talking about ourselves

D: by taking about ourselves she means talking about herself

E: you right you right

D: I'm right I'm right

E: we can do a mini trivia tho! Like hmm.. you! There!

*random girl on stage stares at us*

E: please come on stage!

Her: me?

D: yes you! Hurry the fuck up...

Her: okay! *sits next to depresso*

E: what's your name ?

Her: well in the hood they call me J-eezy but in the club they call me the bitch that always needs a shot

D: wh- j-eezy? I-

Her: nAh I'm playing y'all my name's alyssa but my friends call me alyssa

D: wait a min- *cackles*