5sos Preferences / One shots

Blind Luke AU

Blind Luke

    Being married can be difficult for any couple but a couple that is constantly in the public eye is twice as hard. Luke and I have been married for 4 years. He is in a world famous band and it seemed like every time one of us would breath it was in some magazine. Don’t get me wrong, I love Luke more than anything and there is not a day that I don’t love being his wife, but some days it is just hard and the blindness doesn’t make it any easier. Most times you wouldn’t even know he was blind, he did everything that everyone else did he talked the same, walked the  same, played the same but some days, when he was in a bad mood everything was blamed on the blindness, everything he didn’t want to do he gave the excuse “I can’t do that I’m blind.” even though just the day before he had done the exact something.

        Those days were few and far between though especially now. I am going on 6 months pregnant and Luke has been so great, he hardly complains, he does so much and is always there. He even postponed the tour the second he found out so he could be here the entire time with me and a few months after. That is the way my husband is though. That is the way he has always been. Putting others first, the boys, the fans, his family, me. Everyone came before him in his mind and as much as I loved that I also hated it because it meant he never wanted to talk about himself or what he was thinking or how he was feeling and that makes me feel bad. Today was different though. When he left for some banding this morning he told me to meet him in the park around noon because we needed to talk.

        As I walked though the park I spotted him sitting on a bench basking in the sun. He loved the sun, said he loved how it felt on his skin, I hated the sun, I always felt too hot, especially now that I was pregnant and always hot.I walked over to the bench and grabbed his hand and pulled him to a much shadier bench.

        ”So, what is it you wanted to talk about?”

        ”I wanted to talk about the baby.”

        ”Oh so I was wrong, you aren’t going to talk about yourself for once.”

        ”Didn’t I do enough of that while we were dating?”

        ”Nope.”

        ”Okay, well this is sort of about me. I wanted to talk about the blindness.” That was always what he refereed to it as, the blindness, sperating himself from his lack of sight.

        ”Alright go for it, I’m all ears.”

        ”So do you remember when we first started dating and you asked about it and I said that I didn’t know much about it because it never interested me. Well this is all I have ever known. The Dark. I remember as a child adapting very quickly, I couldn’t see the football games so I had Jack tell me everything that was happening and explain what things meant, I couldn’t see the paper or crayons to draw pictures for my mum so I sang to her instead. I always had to do things differently and learn differently and for a long time I didn’t know it was different, I thought this is how everyone was until I went to school. But anyway that is not the point. I really never was interested in how I got the blindness until you got pregnant. Then I wanted to know everything. I wanted to know what happened to make me this way, was it genetics? Was it something my child could have? So I started asking mom questions about it. She told me that it was from an infection she got while she was pregnant with me. She had to take medication for it and it messed with the development of my eyes and my sight.” He let out a breath as if he had been holding it for years. ” I am so worried that my baby will only ever know the dark, the blindness. I am afraid he will never be able to see the football games or draw you pictures or read books or sheet music or she his mothers beautiful face.  I just want my baby to not deal with this the way I have to.”

        I was stunned, at a loss for words. I took Luke’s hand in mine and placed it on my stomach. “No matter what happens with our child, weather they are blind, or deaf, or have any other disability or if they are perfect, I am going to love them, you are going to love them, hell the whole world will probably love them and they won’t care that can’t do things the normal way, because their daddy can’t do things the normal way and they are going to think that it is sooooo punk rock.”

        ”I am pretty punk rock aren’t I?”

        I laughed and kissed his cheek “Keep telling yourself that, maybe by the time you are 100 it will be true.”