"I guess I'll have to introduce myself, I'm Roger"
Louise Austin is a 20 years old girl, living in London. One day her sister Mary takes her to a concert and Louise catch feelings for a certain drummer ;)
A story of Louise and Roger's freaky life to...
Today I'm giving you this really qt picture of Roger and John with drinks in their hands, you'll get why later! And also listen to 'Make Your Own Kind Of Music ' by Cass Eliot while reading! Louise do it in the chapter!!!
*May 1976*
At Freddie's party
People were dancing and shouting, some of them were even too drunk to talk clear and I wanted to leave but the party had just started. A girl in a short, red dress and with long black hair came towards me and Roger with two drinks in her hands. “You want one?” she asked. Roger took the drink and nodded as a thanks and she looked at me. “No thanks, I don't drink.” I said smiling and put a hand on my belly. I had get used to the thought now, and actually really enjoyed it. Roger swept the drink. “Wait here hunie. I'm just about to go to the lou.” he said and left. I felt sick so I took a seat on a very ugly chair.
Nothing in Freddie and Mary's new house was normal, everything was big and extravagant, it showed that the last album was a success. “Dance with me darling, have a drink!” Freddie said and reached out a hand, waiting for me to take it. “Freddie I can't drink. I'm pregnant as you may know.” he sighed and rolled his eyes. “If you were anymore dull you'd be Deaky.” he said and now it was my turn to roll eyes. “Loyalty is so important, don't you think Louise?” he was clearly drunk now but I wanted to know what he meant so I continued the conversation. “Yes Fred.” “So why do I saw Roger make out with some other girl fifteen minutes ago?” he said the last words with a cocky smile, and even laughed. “Freddie you're high. What have you been taking? Ecstasy?” Freddie mumbled something and walked away. Afraid of the fact that Fred was right I started to look around me, desperately trying to find Roger. But he wasn't there.
“John, have you seen Roger?” I almost screamed to John, that stood alone in a corner. “I think he went upstairs...” John said dreamy, with his eyes focused on the roof. John had a special thing for alcohol, so that he was like this wasn't a surprise. “Alone?” I asked. My heart started beating faster and faster while waiting on his answer. A wave of sickness washed over me when he finally answered. “No, funny you ask. He went hand in hand with a girl which name I think is Victoria, the girl with the red dress you know?” he paused and then said “All of us love Victoria but right now, she isn't much too love.” The last was nonsense I thought, but the other clearly wasn't. “Fuck him. Screw him.” I whispered to myself while I headed upstairs and bit my lip, until I could taste the of blood in my mouth.
I slammed every door in the corridor until I found him. He laid bare breasted at a couch with a girl drooling over him, kissing him as he kissed back. She laid over him in only underwear and on the floor laid a red dress. It was the girl they called Victoria. A anger grew in me, a anger I couldn't control. “What the actual fuck Roger?!” I screamed and they both looked up at me. “Roger Meddows Taylor, I hope you're happy with your new wife!” I pulled the ring off my finger and threw it at Victoria. “Take this. Have a happy life.” The anger burnt over my eyes and I ran away. I made my way through the crowd, with tears flooding down. Someone yelled my name but I just ran outside and faced the spring air.
“Louise wait!” Roger screamed. I turned around to see Roger, taking his shirt on while running. I sat myself quietly in the driver's seat and took the belt on. Roger sat besides me and I started to drive home. When he tried to speak I stopped him so the car ride was quiet until we made it to his apartment. “I'm so sorry Louise, I promise to never do it again.” he had tears in his eyes but so had I so I didn't care. “It's the third time Roger. And you said the same thing to me last time. And the time before that. I can't continue like this.” I loved him but I also felt like I hated him, it was strange. “We're engaged Louise, we're having a baby! Don't throw this away!” he sounded honestly sad but it didn't matter. “So don't go fuck other women! I'm not your fucking groupie! ” I screamed. “I didn't fuck her! It was one kiss, one kiss! I think she spiced the drink she gave me, I don't remember everything.” A silence spread and I thought. When he reached me the ring I laughed. “Are you bloody serious?” The whole situation was funny, did he really think? “This isn't my fault .” he whispered and now I was boiling. I slapped him, but not so hard. I regretted it the second after but he deserved it. The response I got was unexpected, he slapped me back but he was stronger and my whole mouth tasted blood. He covered his mouth with his hands. “I'm so sorry-” It was enough. “Get out of that car, take the ring. I'm sleeping in the car tonight, I'll give Freddie the keys. I'll give you information about the baby, we can discuss childcare when the baby is soon to come.” “But I love you-” I cutted him off “Get out. Now. ” He took the ring and looked at me for a last time but I looked out of the window, didn't want to show him that I cried. As fast as he slammed the door I began to scream and cry, dragging myself in the hair. I didn't know how to act. I hated all this but I loved Roger. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him but I didn't want to get hurt. Maybe she had put something in the drinks but the question was if that made it more okay? He could still control his behavior. I was split.
Putting cassettes in the player I sang along to 'Make Your Own Kind Of Music' by Cass Eliot, one of my favorites. I didn't want to go home so I stayed in the car. A tear fell down my cheek and I laid uncomfortable in a corner of the backseat.
“Nobody can tell you
There's only one song worth singing
They may try and sell you
Cause it hangs them up
To see someone like you
But you gotta make your own kind of music
Sing your own special song
Make your own kind of music
Even if nobody else sings along”
her voice sang.
It was cold in the car but I managed to sleep a couple of hours, the pregnancy and the fact of yesterday fight made me tired. When I woke up I drove home to the phone ringing constantly. Good. I jumped when I saw the black eye I had in the mirror. What have I been thinking with? Here I was, twenty years and pregnant, alone. I decided to do as I always did, I needed to see Mary. Mary had helped me through so many rough times as I had helped her. We had a special connection, a connection only sisters could understand, we fought a lot but we also understood each other very much even if we weren't similar at all.
Pushing the doorbell several times I waited eagerly on her to open. When she did I threw myself in her arms and started in panic “He did it again Mary. And then I punched him. And then he punched me! And then I threw the ring.” Mary backed a few steps to let me see Roger standing there with his hands in his pocket. He was nearing me quickly but I backed a few steps. “Don't touch me.” I said cold and took my bag. “But-” “I said, do not touch me.” I handed him the car keys. “The car stands right behind the house.” Freddie entered the room with tea cups in his hands “Anyone want a cuppa?” Mary send him a killing look and he mumbled something and went in to the kitchen again. “Call me when you have decided which kind of life you want to live.” I left Roger with those words and walked as fast as I could from Mary and Freddie's house. Even if I said to Roger that he shouldn't follow me it had bother me that he didn't ran after me.
I didn't got home. Instead I ran to Roger's apartment. I didn't knew if it was a bad or good thing to do, but the reason was cute and I wanted to share the moment with him. I had felt kicks from the baby for the first time and I wanted him to know.
As expected he wasn't home so I sat myself outside his door and waited. The stone floor was cold and uncomfortable. What the fuck was I thinking with? What the fuck was he thinking with? I knew that I shouldn't be here, that I wasn't the one to follow or forgive him but in some way I knew I had to. I wasn't the same without him. We belonged to each other in some kind of mess.
Author's Note
I literally got mad at Roger while writing this but guys remember it's not real!!!
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And also my friend send me this (shout out to you, I know you read this!!!!!! ) and I've been thinking of the the whole day like wtf
