The Petals ~𝒜 Tododeku 𝐹𝒶𝓃𝒻𝒾𝒸𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃

𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 -♥✧~ 𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟹

//Izuku POV\\
Sunday, 5:47 a.m.

I walked back to the office, practically dragging my dead weight that was my body. I was so tired. Exhausted. But not physically: I could run a mile if I wanted to. The walk didn't affect me that much. It was.. my feelings. I want to hug Todoroki. To call him mine. I want to cuddle him and laugh like we did today. To see his smile more often. I just had to get this disease though, didn't I? Stupid life. It keeps picking on me! 

I whine to myself in my head thinking about stupid and funny this all seemed. All I truly had to do was confess to him. To tell him I liked him and get a response. If he said no then even though I wouldn't want to.. I would get surgery. If he said yes.. Well.. If he said yes then maybe life didn't hate me that much. But it seemed impossible. It always had to me. I mean, when I started U.A, I made friends! That also seemed impossible, but here I am. 

This felt so different, though. I wanted to date him. I had a crush on somebody. I mean, I had middle school crushes (in this universe idk about in the anime lOl-), but of course nobody would date some quirkless loser. So I lost hope; I gave up. I didn't try looking for a friend or somebody to love anymore.. until I came here. Now I'm head over heels for a guy and I have friends. 

I couldn't stop thinking. I'd cough here and there and got snapped out of my thoughts to be met with what was really important. This disease targeted people who felt one-sided love.. I don't know what it entirely meant in all honesty. Does it target people who feel that way (Yes Izu stop overthinking dummy) or does it target people who actually face one-sided love?  If that was true then Todoroki doesn't like me. I had no idea and I hoped that it was the first one. I don't know what I'd entirely do if it was the second. It probably is..

I kept my head down as my mind raced and I walked down the hallways and to the office once more. I only felt my wet tears that were flowing down my face when I went to rub my eyes. I hiccuped. I loved him. I realized it now. It hurts. So badly. I just wish I could let my feelings out. To address it. I was so close. I was going to break down, tell him everything..

I couldn't. I didn't want to put that burden on him. He doesn't like me. If he knew about my upcoming-most likely- death, it would most likely destroy him. To know somebody close to you died because they loved you too much. (What a way to go tho-)

It would hurt me, too. I had somehow accepted but denied this information.. This knowledge of my death. I knew I could prevent it. I think I plan on trying to. For some reason in my mind, the thought of death just doesn't seem that ba-

NO! No.. no.. I'm not going to die. I'm All Might's successor! I won't die because of some stupid disease!! I'm gonna do something about this.. I'm going to live. Of course I am!!

I balled up my hands into fists and clenched them by my sides, scrunching up my face, but letting out a shaky sigh and gave myself a trembling smile with my leftover determination. 

I coughed petals and flowers the entire way back to the room, petals filling my pockets and blood staining the inside of them as well. 

I had made it back to the room to realize nobody was inside and my note was untouched and on the bed. I crumpled it up and threw it to the trash can which was filled with petals. I emptied out my pockets and threw more petals in there. I took my shoes off and placed them by the door again. I got in the bed and sighed. I threw the blanket on myself and stared out the window...

The sun was just rising, changing the color the sky. I smiled at the site but, before I knew it, hours felt like minutes of watching the sun rise up. I had now sat up and set my head on my knee while the other leg lay in front of me. I sat there for hours, doing nothing but stare out the window. I didn't get sleep that night. I couldn't. I didn't feel in control of what I just did, much less remember it...

I snapped out of my trance when the room door had slowly opened and recovery girl stood in the doorway.

[805 words, 4,041 characters]

A/N: My precious bean :( Idk why I made this so angsty I- Poor boy :( eeeeee I'm trying to stay in character lmaoo deku is much more upbeat I suppose so I just tried to make him a bit more determined to live and to not give up and be like "guess ill DIE" so thats something

This was originally like 500 words but i added a lot more to show my bois inner thoughts owo

ALSO sorry for not posting school's got my busy hehe and I keep reading those dekuverse fanfics like a weeb lmAOO and like my shoulder feels like he ec c and its hard to type so I can't do much and I-

ALSO ALSO if u have any fanfics that are hella good plz recommend >:OO 

ALSO ALSO ALSO 

Would you guys want a bad ending or a good ending?? i mean prolly good but im js this could go horribly wrong and bad and depressing and I can just do that 

okay bye now