medley, a series.

two whole rests.

eddy tried his best not to seem like a karen.

live, laugh, love.

but he tried to embody the spirit, the positivity behind it. he tried to live life a little, find new things he liked to do, laugh about anything he possibly could, and hell, he loved his job - which brought him back to his current, dismal state. the turmoil in him bubbled like a witch's cauldron.

he felt too big in an all-too-small room, floor scattered with music scores which had all failed to distract him. eddy thinks love is a chronic disease. he'd felt it since he was thirteen after he met brett, and self diagnosed himself with said disease when he learnt about chronic illnesses in biology. now, he was nearly one and a half decades into coping with it while trying to be a good best friend to brett.

but this acute episode of wild fleeting thoughts seemed all too much. thoughts of the bespectacled, shorter male crowded his head. how he'd always forget sheet music, his wide eyes when he realised that he screwed something up, the squished face he'd always made when he was cringing, aptly followed with an "uggggghhhhhh" that sounded like a d-flat. the look of his face when eddy bought him bubble tea out of the blue, when he bounced on the balls of his feet to the beat of music, the way his face beamed with surprise and amusement. 

they'd been through so much together, eddy remembers the days they'd spend at each other's house practising or mugging. the days when he'd wake brett up and laugh at brett's notes which were covered in drool. eddy remembers the days when they had practice marathons, where they practiced almost all day and night. the days when he'd never seen brett so worn out and yet look so enticing as a bolster in his warm and comfy, certainly oversized hoodie. eddy remembers the days, his best years yet, touring the world with his best friend, doing something they loved. playing as twoset. the days that had past so fast, city to city, and eddy could've sworn he saw Orion in his eyes when they were out stargazing one night. and he'd fallen hard, over the years. he wasn't sure how much further he could fall. because what if brett didn't feel the same? 

all too much boiled over when said man barged into the room.

"eddy chen! i've been looking for you all over the place! you have a phone for a reason!" brett exclaimed, but softened when he saw eddy, all blanked out, laying on the floor. "hey," he began softly, sitting beside the lanky boy and touching his shoulder, "you alright?".

right. - he'd given brett a copy of the keys to his apartment.

and it suddenly occurred to eddy how different they were from a decade and a half ago. they'd saw each other grow, and mature. from being reckless schoolboys to youtubers trying to make it big with their shared passions. brett wasn't that regular clubber or partier from university anymore. brett wasn't that unsure, insecure boy that chose to take the leap of faith to study music. if anything, brett made eddy feel secure. he made eddy happy, feel whole and-

"brett. i've got something on my mind for awhile. for a long while."

surely, brett can deal with this like an adult right?

"i think i'm in love with you. and i think i have been for a long time."

there was a pause. eddy waited for a response with bated breath. and exactly two whole rests later,

"i know, you dumbass.
i always knew.
i've waited for a long time too."