Nicknames (SkepHalo)

Chapter four

As the door opened, Darryl felt his body still before revealing Zak the teen hidden behind the door as he poked his head out. The man offered a gentle smile before he spoke, "Hey Skep" Darryl smiled, the teen looking at him as if at a lost for words before finally speaking,

"Call me Zak".

The last time Darryl had come over, the teen insisting that they call each other by their names when face to face instead of their youtube personalities.

Laughing sheepishly, Darryl scratching the back of his neck feeling bad before being offered to come inside as he mumbled a soft 'sorry'.

The apartment was empty, besides being furnished and the occasional few books here and there, Darryl surprised that Zak could even read with his typing capabilities. Darryl stepped inside, slipping off his shoes as he looked up to be greeted with the full view of the teen his heart sinking at the sight of Zak.

The boy had gotten skinner, and not just by a pound, his back facing the older man as he walked into the living room unaware to Darryl's eyes not being able to peel away as he watched the way he walked. The gap between his legs, it made the man uneasy Darryl knowing he couldn't have weighed more than 110, feeling that number was pushing it.

He was too thin, far to thin. How could this happen in such a short span of time, it had only been a few weeks since the last time he saw Zak on camera? Darryl shook away the thought as he followed after the boy seating himself on the opposite end of the couch from Zak, seeing the teen cross his legs like a child making Darryl chuckle as he turned his body to face his friend.

"What's up man," Zak asked, leaning back into the soft cushions.

Darryl paused, feeling himself stiffen as he wondered if he should just be forthcoming, feeling the way his chest sunk looking at the teen once so full of life.

"Well," the vowel being drawn out trying to keep his tone playful; light, "I was worried about you"

Zak furrowed his brows looking beyond the definition of adorable, Darryl trying not to take notice of the teen's reaction as he fell victim.

"Worried about me? I'm fine!" the insistent in his voice caused Darryl to shake his head, he knew the boy was lying but he just couldn't say that without causing an argument knowing it would end to nothing but bickering, the boy's body language, everything, it all seemed so off, everything just felt wrong; this isn't how it's supposed to be.

"Zak, look at you!" Darryl knew his voice had been raised but no more than a notch, but the startled reaction he got from Zak told him otherwise. "You look practically weightless!" Zak knew he shouldn't have liked the sound of that, but oh did hearing that feel good.

'weightless'

"Dude I'm fine your over reacting" Darryl groaned, "Zak, seriously I'm worried about you" the mood in the room had changed, desperate.

"Why?"

The question was simple, but it had taken Darryl a moment to process, why? How could he-

"Why? Because I care about you!" maybe more then he should, but this wasn't the time for a lost love knowing it was for nothing, a one-sided love song. Zak huffed, feeling himself laugh,

"Care about me?" he spat as if it was a joke frustrating Darryl as the man glared at the teen.

"This isn't a joke; you look sick for goodness sake! What's happening?" Zak looked at Darryl, his lips pursed feeling the words but not able to speak.

"I want to help" the teen looked at the man wanting to make a snarky remark or a joke about the irony that was said but he remained silent looking down at his hands, the tone Darryl had used made the teen's stomach turn it was so gentle, caring.

"Sick? I'm fine"

The long moment before Zak looked up was antagonizing, meeting the strong green eyes of the man before him capturing him.

"You're not fine" Zak laughed, the guilt seeming to vanish each time Darryl spoke, yet it always returned so quickly.

"And how would you know if I was fine." It was a statement, far from a question and Zak knew he was pressing the man seeing the way is face got flustered trying to get his point across.

"I- I don't know, but something isn't right, this isn't you" the stutter, why could- how was- Zak looked at Darryl, this had been the man he'd fallen helpless for, knows the emotions he held but this- this was the same man who made him this way, Zak wanted to be perfect.

But was it for himself? Or for Darryl?

"Yea, and who's fault is that." Darryl looked taken back as the boy now glared daggers at him, ignoring the painful sting in his chest as if someone had just torn out one of his heart.

"what?"

Zak looked at the brunette, his eyes burning as he looked at the person who made him like this, his emotions falling to pieces, crumbling away, fading.

Just like Zak.

"I'm fat," he cried, "and you- you made me" his cries interrupted by sharp stutters, his heart pounding painfully, " you made me realize!" his voice raised, losing the little control he tried to show what little dominance he had over the situation.

Fat? Why would Zak think he's fat, it didn't make sense to the man as he looked at the teen only hoping it was just something else, anything else. How could he make him realize he was fat; it just didn't click—

"Zak how-"

"You, you called me that name I- I can't" name? fat?

Darryl looked at the crumbling teen, watching as the boy's eyes slowly turned pink holding back the tears that threatened to spill watching as Zak ignored the stinging sensation as he glared,

"You're not fat, I don't know what I said to make you feel that way" he was lost trying so hard to find the piece to make everything fall into place, but it wasn't there. Zak laughed; the painful laugh Darryl had heard one to many times as the boy rubbed his eyes feeling himself hiccup.

"Shut up! Don't you dare say that, you don't see what I see!" the teen finally broke, allowing the tears to fall, "You don't see it!" his voice cracked, the once energetic boy lost in a fit as he cried.

"I can't eat, I have to write it down, I have to look in the mirror I have to look at my sides my-" his cries got louder as he sobbed, constantly whipping away at his eyes unable to look at the man seated aside from him, "I look wrong, I'm a fatty- I-" his sobs broke, the teen hiccupping as he tried to silence himself, not wanting to feel weak.

Darryl looked at Zak, his heart aching painfully as he watched the boy crumble, 'fatty'? that's all it had taken to send the boy into a spiral, he had done this. He had broken the boy just from a stupid nickname he said on a call. Zak whimpered softly, his body shaking violently as he tried to still himself to no avail feeling pathetic like a child crying from split milk.

"I'm sorry"

His body moved on instinct taking the boy into his arms, pulling Zak into his chest as the teen cried. "Shh, none of this is your fault, don't be sorry" the man whispered softly into Zak's ear feeling the boy tremble in his arms as he cried louder at Darryl's words, his hands visibly shaking. He had caused this, he- Darryl closed his eyes, holding Zak close rubbing soothing circles into the teen's back wishing he could take the boy's pain away, the pain he had started but a nickname meant for nothing more than a tease.

Everything started fitting together, the reasons Zak hadn't streamed, the reasons why he always felt tired, his voice getting softer. This was all his fault; he had hurt the one he loved. 

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Sorry, this took so long to update. Having to deal with personal matters sadly.

But I hoped you all enjoyed this chapter, please leave a vote or comment if you got a moment to spare. Anyhow have a lovely day darlings.