Academy Shorts

Anatomy

Kota stared out the passenger window of the BMW as Victor drove down the familiar roads. Kota never got a chance to simply enjoy the scenery these days. He was always busy driving or rushing off to somewhere that demanded all his attention. This time, though, his mind could relax a couple notches. We're there always this many trees in his subdivision?

Victor drove smoothly with his typical classical music playing over the speakers. The flute concerto was a nice backdrop to the naturey stuff they were passing. The boys were heading to Kota's house to meet up with some of the others and brainstorm some marketing ideas for a charity function. Maybe they could incorporate an arboreal theme.

Kota's phone pinged with a text.

Luke: Hey. Where's your dog brush?

Kota's eyebrow quirked up along with the corners of his mouth. Luke wanted to groom Max while he waited for everyone to show up? How nice.

Kota: In the garage above Max's crate.

Then again, this was Luke. No one ever really knew what he was up to.

Luke: Do you have a dog comb?

Kota: ...no?

"Who is that?" Victor asked while never taking his eyes off the road.

"Luke," Kota replied as the bouncing dots in the text indicated that Luke was typing another message. "He and Nathan are already there."

Luke: Aw, man. Where's your comb? Or does Jessica have one I can borrow?

Dozens of different prank scenarios scrolled through Kota's head. This couldn't be good.

Kota: We are almost there. Just wait.

Moments later, Victor and Kota entered Kota's house through the garage. They found a mess in the living room. Dog treats littered the floor, and the carpet was dirty with something dark and powdery. Luke knelt in the middle of the room with a dog brush in his hand. His free hand wrested with Max in front of him, who was desperately trying to stretch and reach for one of the spilled doggie treats nearby.

"What in the..." Victor trailed off.

Kota planted his hands on his hips and looked to Nathan, who was sitting on a couch with an ankle over his knee. "What are you two doing?"

Nathan shrugged and tipped his head to the golden retriever and the blond teen. "I'm just watching."

Luke snickered as he grabbed the treat and fed it to Max. "You make it sound kinky."

Victor sat beside Nathan and rubbed his face in exasperation. "Luke, why is one of Kota's ties around your head?"

Nathan chuckled. "Of all that's going on, that's what you ask about?"

Indeed, a formal black tie was looped around the crown of Luke's head, the long length hanging down and to the side of his face. "Gabe says I look good in a tie and need to wear one more. I'm just fulfilling the quota."

Kota toed the dirt in the carpet, grinding it in slightly before deciding that was a bad idea. "I'm certain this isn't what he meant, Luke."

"Pfft. I know that."

"What is this stuff?" Kota followed up.

"Catnip," Luke answered.

Kota blinked several times in a row. He pushed his glasses further up his nose. "Where did you get catnip? I don't have any here at home."

"Next door."

Kota groaned at the implication tied on to that reply, and then turned to head toward the closet that held the vacuum. "Why is it in the carpet?"

Victor waved his hands in circles impatiently. "Just explain everything before we play more Twenty Questions."

Luke sat back on his haunches and set the dog brush down beside him. He had to fling his head to get the tie out of his face. "On the way here," he began, "I realized that dogs don't have belly buttons. So I brought out the treats to try and get Max to lay still long enough for me to look."

The dog in question finished the one treat and hopped up to find another.

The vacuum didn't have the right attachments on from when Jessica used it last, so Kota had to dig through the closet to find the right parts. "You used all the treats?"

"No. Well, yes," Luke said cryptically. "I spilled them by accident. So Max wasn't staying still like I needed. I figured catnip works on cats and makes them all spacey. Why not try it out on him?" He pointed at Max, who happily munched on another snack. "I know your neighbors next door have two cats, and the catnip was easy to find. I swear I was in and out."

Victor turned to Nathan. "You didn't try and stop him?"

Nathan held his hands up defensively. "I was busy trying to find a Cool Whip container or ziplock bag to put all the treats in. He was gone before I realized it."

"It's ok," Luke said. "I didn't need anyone to hold my legs this time. The kitchen window was unlocked."

Kota plugged in the vacuum, but didn't turn it on yet.

"Catnip doesn't work on dogs," Luke continued. "I know that now."

Kota sighed. "Max!" he said commandingly. "Here, boy."

Max looked up from trying to shove his snout under the couch and immediately trotted over to his owner. His tail wagged happily.

"Belly," Kota ordered.

Max flopped onto the floor and exposed his underside to everyone. Luke's jaw dropped open. "That's all it takes?!" he cried while waddling on his knees over to the dog. His fingers started petting and sloppily parting Max's fine belly fur. Upon realizing he left the dog brush halfway across the living room, he looked up at Kota with his brown eyes. "Can I still borrow your comb?"

Kota chuckled and turned on the vacuum, purposely ignoring the question. The suddenly loud noise of the appliance startled Max, who jumped up and ran down the hall toward the bedrooms. Luke pouted at Max's retreat, then got up to chase him down.

Instead of trees as the charity marketing theme, Kota decided he would suggest puppies as he pushed the vacuum head back and forth over the carpet.

***
A/N: This was inspired by a random conversation I had with my husband. We talk about weird things.