Glimpse

Chapter 29: Shayne **MATURE**

"It's not fair," Shayne cried into Courtney's neck. Chaos scrambled his brain, a juxtaposition of emotions fragmenting his actions and thoughts. The drive to erase Alternate Shayne's mark propelled palms to scorch her waist, while the agony pressing him to let her go cascaded down his face. Forcing a deep breath, he sorted through his jumbled thoughts. "It's not fair to let you fall for me when I can't always be there to catch you. When I know that I won't be."

"And breaking-up with me is?" Courtney choked out. Fingers tangled in short blonde locks urged him closer, and he obliged, open-mouthed kisses clearing their mixed tears from her throat. He clung to her, and she to him until nothing but their spluttered sobs soiled the icy wind around them. Lights dimmed, and shadows consumed. Inner turmoil evacuated the duo and dispersed into the night.

Darkened clouds loomed above, their swirling grey descending at a snail's pace. Condensation weighed their feather-light pillows, unraveling the molecular bonds sealing their invisible gates. As entropy aligned, droplets plummetted to the ground. One splashed the nape of Shayne's neck, splintered beads trickling under the collar of his green T-shirt. Another soon joined it, and another, and then another until salt and fresh water mingled, and shivers clattered teeth. Reluctance saw skin lingering on skin as they separated.

Without her heat to calm his nerves, tremors tortured him as he retrieved his keys from his back pocket. Their jingling disturbed the stark quietness that thickened the night. Shayne sighed. An accident is the last thing we need. With a rueful glance, Shayne handed them to Courtney, and she retreated to the car.

Hey Fuck Face, you have the night to fix this. But I swear, come tomorrow, if I find out you went through with this shitty ass coward's plan of yours... Well, I'll let your imagination fill in the blanks. Got it?

Drenched hair stuck to his forehead, and damp cotton displayed every ridge carved into his torso. The sprinkling now a full-blown downpour. He embraced it. Rain splattering his tilted face cleansed the salt caking his flesh, and the red tainting his whites receded.

"I'm sorry."

"I can't keep doing this, Shayne." Courtney white-knuckled the steering wheel, wavering lips and unstable swallows escaping her fractured mask. My fault. It anchored his stomach to his seat, hollowing his chest and shredding his tattered resolve. Still, he neglected her, the lights streaking the highway shining off his tear-blurred eyes.

Two days' worth of panic infected his blood, gushing through him with each heartbeat. A pulsating reminder of the fate Alternate Shayne promised to him. Disappearing. He was disappearing. Someday soon. The pelting of catastrophes he had suffered all focalizing into one conclusion. You'll leave me once you process this, so let me be the bad guy here.

"And sorry isn't good enough. I need-" A sharp inhale cut her words. "I need reassurance. Something more than just an empty promise that you won't run away again. That your Alternate saving the day won't become a habit." The reminder tore through him, leaving the resurgence of Alternate Shayne's grubby paws contaminating in its wake. How could you let him touch you like that? The sour taste. The bitterness. The hatred and disgust. It swarmed him, pricking his fingertips and hardening his shell.

"You're siding with him now?" Shayne asked through clenched teeth. Through the corner of his eye, he discerned her brow sharpening and nails to drilling into the steering wheel.

"Do you really expect me to root for my own break-up?" The tension mangling his gut dissipated upon hearing her rationale.

"I'm dumb, okay? And I'm pretty sure tonight shows that. I'm dumb and cowardice, and fuck, you deserve better." Spiraled-pads pursued the trails of water splattering the passenger-side window. "Someone who can actually give you what you need. Someone who can be there for you. I'm not that. Not anymore."