"What if I never love again?"
What if I never love again?
What if I gave my heart to a man whose hands
Twisted and warped it into something else?
You told me to move on,
but I can't.
I can't move on.
What if all of that was for nothing?
What if I was nothing but a fickle thing to you?
An electrical current soared between us
And yet we tripp'd upon its wire,
Smashed our faces on the ground.
We didn't scrape our knees falling for each other.
We fucking broke them.
But then you got up, and you soared.
Rubbing your happiness like cow-shit into all of our faces.
You plastered your sores but you did not let them heal.
You put a bandage over them, covered up the putrid mess and pretended that they weren't there.
And now?
They rot at your flesh and tear away at your soul.
They break and fester away the happiness-mirage that you put up.
They gnaw away at the crumbling walls until there's nothing left but a hollow corpse.
Insanely devoid of humanity.
Me?
I pretended I was happy too.
But in reality, I scraped myself up slowly from the pavement.
Using a blunt-edged knife to scrape up the pieces of my soul that you blew apart.
My soul-pieces.
I sat there, on that pavement of broken shards.
And sowed my pieces back together again.
Trying to pull back my naked body.
Bare needled.
Bare threaded.
Bare pained.
Some pieces will forever be entangled upon those shards.
I shredded myself too much trying desperately to reach out to them.
So, I Iet them be. Forever tokens of mistakes forgotten.
And I limped off
Moving away from your putrid, rotting carcass.
YOU ARE READING
Eilerasciai Su Jausmais
PoesíaThe name of this book is loosely based on the Lithuanian meaning for "poems with feelings." And indeed, they do feel. They feel the rawness of every possible emotion ever felt. They are heartfelt poems, written from the nonsensical thinkings of the...
