Cordially, Yours!

-9-

"Manik!" Nyonika's shrill voice hit his ears.

"Not know, Nyonika! Get out, I said!" Manik threw a chair in her direction which clashed with ground and broke inches away from her. The shatter was loud enough to scar Nyonika away and she fumed out banging the door. A moment of silence followed. Manik fell to his feet, defeatedly- defeated not externally but, crumbled inside. Cabir was right to warn him. Mukti was wrong, he needed Fab 5 as much as they did. Aliya was wrong, she never came back to him as a friend. Dhruv was wrong again, in all aspects. And he?

"You are right Manik! You know I didn't know how to cycle until I was 7. I tried it once when I was 5, but I failed and crashed very badly into a bush. May be that's why I am so small.  But, you know I finally learnt it... One day early in a wintry morning, appa came to me at four in the morning. Can you believe it, Manik, 4 AM, even the sun hadn't opened it eyes and had just closed them after lat-night cartoons with Rishabh. But, Appa, I couldn't say no to him , so we went outside and there was a glittering, brand new cycle awaiting me. I was so happy, the little innocent me started to jump up and down inside me. But, then, I saw the catch, the it was two-tiered cycle and not a tricycle. I remember distinctly, the moment I noticed it, I came to standstill, my stomach fell deep into a pit. It a terrifying just by the look of it- the memories and bruises of last time felt afresh and I looked at appa. His eyes were soft and comforting, he told me, "I am here, kanna". He made comfortable on the small seat of the cycle and I pushed the paddle slightly. The wheels staggered a bit, the chain clicked against itself but, slowly, the cycle started to roll on its own. Something sparked within and pushed the paddle a bit again, I could here Appa shout from behind, "Keep the handle straight, kanna. Don't go on to the right. Stay steady and slow, don't fall". But, I was in my own world, the lazy heart within me was complaining about exercising so early morning on a staggering cycle but, somewhere I enjoyed it and wanted to shriek back to him and say, "Look appa I can cycle". I turned to look behind at him and he was far-away, far behind, I shivered and the cycle swerve and staggered again and I fell down. Appa came running to me and passed a warm smile and took me home. Next day, I again turned back from my cycle, it staggered again and my eyes which previously looked at the road now, closely inspected the road bumps. But, Appa would bring me up and we would do this again the next day, and the next. Until, I once thought, that I would get over this fear. I got on to cycle and determined to end my fear, I paddled and shot off at a very fats pace. The wind gushed past me, I fell in love with the speed. Appa screamed from behind, "Kanna, slow down, there are pebbles on the road! You will crash into someone!" But, the wind kissed my cheek and may hair danced along, until, my foot slipped from the pedal and I came crashing down, again into the bush. My knees bled again and tears slipped from eyes, but this time, what was really injured was my pride! Appa came running to me, "Don't ride the cycle from tomorrow!" he declared, seriousness layered in his voice. I hadn't seen him like that ever before. But now wanted to, I had fallen in love with it. Yesterday, I had fallen because of fear but, today, I fell because of my foolishness. I understood, that you can fear but if you don't correct your foolishness, toh woh tumhari aadat ban jati hi. So next day, I woke up and took the cycle off the stand and rode it for miles away from home, took a turn and came back without falling. I went back home running and woke up Appa and narrated him everything and proudly announced, "Look Appa, I learnt how to ride a cycle!". Appa smiled back and said, "Kanna, tum ne cycling nahi sikhi, zindagi mein chalna sikhgaya." He explained to me that the handle was our focus, the pedal was our hard-work. Yeh chalti hui cycle, tumhari kamiyaabi jo chal rahi hi ek raaste par, zindagi. He explained, ki ghamand ki raftaar aur insaani rishto ki ghando mein main baar-baar girungi, par mujhe uthna hi, cycle ko phirse khada karna hi aur chalate jana hi tab tak jab tak maut ki khai na aa jai." Nandini cajoled. Manik looked into her deep brown orbs that had a story of their own.  His eyes welled up at the memory of her. She was right-- he would always know where to find her, no matter what, she was his hope- his shining star. "I miss you!" he whispered under his breath and the tears he held back since long spilled through.

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Nandini stood staring into the vastness of the valley. The dark sky with twinkling stars, she wondered if her Appa also searched for answers when looking at them. Did he also see what she saw today? Did he also look up to find solace and comfort in the gone-bys? Did he also see the many shades of grey even if the sky was pitch black? Did he also seek advice from the moon and shooting stars? 

She wanted to see the sunrise, she had already witnessed sunsets. She wanted to see if the dawn brought her hope back or was it gone with the winds of dusk, forever. 

"Life's answers won't be found in the dungeons of fantasy and thoughts. " A manly voice startled Nandini intruding into her space. 

"Uhh?" she answered bewildered. 

"Reality helps and sometimes, this too."He handed her the bottle of beer and sat down next to her. Nandini took the bottle from his hand and took a sip. There were so many changes around her, one more won't harm right?  

"This height, it's tempting?" the stranger asked. 

Nandini looked down at their dangling feet and the never-ending, funnel depth of the valley. On any other day, she would have dried from the inside, but today, she was relaxed staring into darkness. It felt as if she was staring into herself. 

Receiving no response, he continued, "Take a leap of faith." Nandini shifted her gaze from the depths and bore into his eyes. " It won't hurt, I promise." he whispered. 

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Dear Readers,

Experiences matter and this piece is derived from many places- more than I can count and pay proper credit to. So, I hope they understand that it is my love for them and their impression on me which dedicates this piece to them. 

Love, 

HF

P.S. This one is a secret dedication to a special one who inspires me! Without any names, if you are reading, you know what you gave and where you lie in this piece and my heart. Thank you, you-know-who!