𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 james x alex

christ what are chapters and how do you names them

When Alex finally wakes up he doesn't immediately remember what they talked about. He has a blessed minute of peace as he wakes up and heads to the loo to have a slash when, mid-piss, it actually comes back to him and his eyes go from half-lidded and still barely coherent to I actually fucking decided to stay married to James.

He's hit by a wave of cold shock and shudders it off, washing his hands. He wonders if James is up and if James remembers the conversation at all.

Washing off his hands, he peers into James' room a minute later. James is still sound asleep, snoring.

Alex can't take it back. He regrets saying what he said last night in a way because it's way too much, it's something they shouldn't do, but now he can't take it back, he can't hurt James that way, and this is just a thing that's going to have to happen.

He's going to be married for a year.

He stares at James as he thinks about this. At least it's going to be to James, if he has to do a sham marriage, because it won't change much. They'll probably just go about things the way they always do and it'll be a little awkward for the year until they get it annulled or divorced.

Will it be divorce by then? They'll have to get all the forms for whatever it takes to get the marriage legalised in the UK as well filled out. Alex can't remember, suddenly, what would make it different between annulling the marriage and getting a divorce.

He's not sure whether or not he should be disappointed. He thinks about it for another minute. He never wanted to be a failure of a husband. He never wanted this, though, to be honest.

This is all asking for an mental breakdown to happen if he doesn't direct his train of thought away - is this meaningless, what in his life has true meaning, is he making James' life less meaningful by doing this.

So instead, he thinks about what a good husband would do. He imagines waking up to someone else, someone he loves, and what he'd want to do while they were asleep to make them happy.

He could make breakfast. So he resolves to do that. He's going to try his best to make this at least meaningful and full of as little regret as possible for James, for both of them.

James mentioned pancakes last night. He remembers that. Proper, fluffy pancakes. (had to put it in crepes or British pancakes are shit idc what you say)

Alex googles "fluffy pancake recipe", browses until he finds one he likes. Chocolate chip pancakes. That sounds good and James would probably like it. Although the recipe doesn't call for chocolate chips, all he has to do is throw them in there.

He sets about mixing ingredients that he somehow owns, in bowls, following the recipe until he's got a thick mess of batter. He preheats the pan and pours in the first few pancakes, trying to avoid little driblets of mess as he tilts the bowl back up, dropping in a sprinkling of chocolate chips in each one.

He waits until bubbles are forming in the pancakes and the edges are just curling up slightly and he slides the spatula underneath, tests them. They're almost ready to be flipped but not quite.

Alex hums to himself as he waits, feeling almost pleased with himself. He's doing something that will make James happy and right now. He flips the pancakes and looks at the golden-brown of them.

When he's made all of the pancakes, full of chocolate chips, he sets them aside and puts them in the microwave because James still isn't up.

"Making breakfast?" James asks.

Alex is slightly suprised for a moment wondering how James of all people had snuck up on him,"Made y' chocolate chip pancakes," Alex announces. James pauses blinks and smiles drowsily.